Is he using me for sex?

was seeing a guy for a few months at the start of this year and I’ve recently got involved with him again. We didn’t exactly end on good terms when we stopped seeing each other back in May and didn’t talk apart from saying hi when we saw each other (I have to see him pretty much on a daily basis). Anyway a couple of months ago he started trying to make conversation every time we saw each other and then started texting me again, he seemed to be making an effort to get back into my good books again. We did end up sleeping together about a month ago and since then he’s just stopped making the effort. We have slept together a few more times since but he doesn’t really text me unless he wants me to go round to his where we will end up having sex and we haven’t been on any proper dates since. When I do see him he will either be extremely nice with me or will be a bit off, he just seems to be a bit distant sometimes. Does it seem like he’s using me for sex? When I was last seeing him i did have a strong feeling that he was seeing other girls cause even though he never said he was I’d sometimes see hair ties or hair grips on his bedroom floor if I went round (that definitely weren’t mine, I know it makes me seem paranoid) and also I got told by someone that he had other girls on the go but this guy didn’t really like him so I didn’t want to listen to everything he was saying. Anyway he did hurt me last time with the way he was and I feel like now he could be using me for sex. 

3 Answers

  • Nitro
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    Here's the thing. If he has hurt you before, he will do it again (even if he has apologized to you about whatever he did to hurt you the first time - believe me, I know from experience). A guy like that (who sleeps with girls only to not put in a whole lot of effort into pursuing them) is incapable of having a successful relationship. Why? Because he doesn't respect women. And no matter how much you want to believe he's not sleeping with other women, the signs point to it. Any guy who goes ghost or disappears for days on end (or in general is just not fully committed to you) is likely interacting with other women.

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  • 1 month ago

    It certainly seems so. Sex might be fun obviously, as are drink and drugs no doubt, but outside of a strong and well established relationship it can turn out to be disastrous. Not only can pregnancy and STDs result, but sexual intercourse can often be emotionally bonding (especially if regular or frequent), and when the strong friendship, mutual values and interests etc. are not in place this can prove emotionally confusing. Just read some of the questions here, or watch some of the daytime t.v. shows with very unhappy people who have had sex too soon and/or with the wrong person. It can also cost a girl her self respect and the respect of others (including future boyfriends). 

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Of course he is.  That's what you get for giving it up too easily.  I hope you have learned your lesson.

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