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i can’t sleep with someone else in my bed?

i am a 20 year old female & i am a very light sleeper. i wake up to every noise and sometimes i will wake myself up by moving in my sleep. i am also a very uncomfortable sleeper. my mattress and pillows are extremely comfortable but i toss and turn all night trying to find the perfect sleeping position and i can never get comfortable. my boyfriend is the exact opposite. he can sleep through anything, is a very deep sleeper, & can fall asleep anywhere! we have been together for a few years now and have started sleeping over at each other’s houses occasionally. i discovered that i can’t stand sharing a bed. it’s hard enough to sleep on my own but with someone next to me it is even harder. i’m afraid of hurting his feelings if i said anything but i don’t want to wait too long and have it be an issue if moving out and marriage are in our future. any advice?

8 Answers

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  • 2 months ago

    Do it Swedish style and get two single beds next to each other with separate duvets. That way you can be naughty on his side and roll over to your side to sleep. Separate bedding means you do not pull the sheets off each other. 

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  • 3 months ago

    This is a really good opportunity.  Happy couples communicate and talk about everything that is important.  Its an easy topic to bring up. 

    Have a conversation about sleep.  Mention that you have always been a light sleeper and ask him what his secret is to sleeping so soundly.  Talk about waking up every night multiple times to the slightest sound and movement.   Ask him what wakes him up at night. Let the conversation drift toward the fact that you wake up more often when sleeping next to someone.  

    Meanwhile improve you sleep habits if you can by doing things like eliminating caffeine after the morning; getting in a little aerobic exercise each day, keeping regular sleep hours, and winding down with relaxing stuff before bed time.   Learn how to relax and let your mind wander when you get woken up.

    It wouldn't hurt to have your doctor give you a referral to a sleep lab to see if there's a medical problem affecting your sleep. 

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  • Jim
    Lv 4
    3 months ago

    Buy two twin beds and put them side by side. 

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  • 3 months ago

    Explain to him how you can't sleep due to being a light sleeper

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  • 3 months ago

    if you can't sleep with someone then marriage is not gonna work. Tell him today that you really like sleeping alone and it has nothing to do with him personally. The see what he says. Maybe wait on sleeping together. He will not like this as he probably loves you very much and will be very confused.

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  • 3 months ago

    Good Sex make you sleepy enough not to care anymore. 

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  • Teva
    Lv 5
    3 months ago

    Separate beds, or separate houses even, if he's amenable. Personally i only ever have a woman in my bed when I'm having sex. When I'm sleeping i prefer to be alone. Maybe you'll be pleasantly surprised by his response 😂

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  • 3 months ago

    Yep it sucks, i am the same way but i learned a secret. A couple shots of vodka before bed fixes that right up

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