Childfree people : How do you cope with being alone?What are your substitutes for having children ? ?

Hello everyone ! 

Do, I'm thinking about staying kidless, for reasons that are not " selfish". 

1) Because I don't want to bring a child into this world ti suffer.You never know when you are going to be in situations where you don't have anything to eat, ot when it's winter and it's below 0 and you have no heat. 

2) Because I would like to focus on my goals/ dreams. Of  pursuing a career. It's hard to raise a baby and go to school. 

3) Because I have absolutely no Idea how to educate a child and I'm worried that they'll end up being a drug addict or do something that will take them to jail. 

4) I value sleeping In peace 

Ever since I was a little girl i've struggled with insomio issues where I can't sleep 

Now that I'm older I get mad when somebody doesn't let me sleep because they're making noise since I am a light sleeper. 

5) Because not having any children reduces 56.8% of carbon dioxide. 

These are my 4 reasons to consider staying childfree. 

I really do enjoy the company of my family specially since ot's christmas and love them with all my heart, but here the question is Where will I end up when they are not with me anymore? What could be some substitutes for having children ? 

Advice please , thank you in advance ! Merry christmas !🎁🎅🎄


Let it be know that I do support everyone's decision to have kids or not. It's not that I don't like children I just  don't know how to have patience to deal with them.i'm also thinking twice about having kids before I bring them into this world. 

7 Answers

  • Edna
    Lv 7
    10 months ago

    If you don't want to have children, you don't have to try to 'cope' with being childless and you don't have to try to find a substitute for children. MANY people choose not to ever have children, simply because they don't WANT to have children, and they are happy and content with that decision.

  • 10 months ago

    One of our daughters and her husband are not planning to have biological children. 

    They have two cats whom they love. They live in a state with a lot of outdoor activity opportunities, and they enjoy being active.  They both have jobs they enjoy, and they spend time with friends.

    They are currently in their late 20s. They are open to the idea of possibly adopting children from foster care in the future - they would be really good parents, they just don't have the desire to give birth to them.

  • Anonymous
    10 months ago

    Get a cat or two. Or if you must, a dog. You'll love them and you won't even miss screaming kids.

  • Anonymous
    10 months ago

    I'm 51 and childfree.  My husband and I both have hobbies.  I volunteer (I retired early and he's getting ready to retire).  We travel a lot.  We take classes on things that interest us.  I don't see any of this as a substitute for having children.  Frankly, I have no desire to have children and think life with children would be a living hell, so I'm good with my life.  My husband works with plenty of folks who have kids.  He listens to their stories and regularly comes home and tells me how grateful is that he's not stuck in their lives.  We both do what we want and enjoy it.  I can't imagine life any other way.

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  • Anonymous
    10 months ago

    You find other things to do in your free time.

    Join a club - book club - country club - whatever - any kind of social activity to take up some of your time.  You mentioned that you want to focus on your career/school - so going back to school will certainly take up some of your time and there may be activities available to do while you further your education.  (some colleges probably have study groups - clubs - or other social activities for students to participate in - look into those activities for any spare time you feel you have.)

    Do volunteer work - find a local organization that needs help and volunteer some free time each week.  It doesn't need to involve children - it can be anything at all.  

    Take up a sport and become part of a team.   Depending on your job situation, some companies sponsor softball teams during the summer or maybe bowling leagues in the winter.

    You will certainly have free time to go out with friends or family - so make plans with your friends whenever possible.

    Take up a hobby or activity that you can do on your own to occupy your mind and your time.

    Get a pet.  A cat or a dog will take up some of your time and attention.  (personally - I recommend a cat - they are less "needy" than a dog and can be left alone for longer time frames without worrying about having someone there to let the pet out to go pee and poo.)

    Children are great - but if you don't feel like you want them - don't ever let anyone make you think that having them is the only way to have a "complete" life.  At some point - you might feel differently - but even if you never do - it is your life and you need to live it the way you feel is best for you.  Sometime in the future - you might gain enough experience and enough security to feel differently about the reasons you have made this choice right now.

    Whatever is in your future - good luck.

  • Matt
    Lv 6
    10 months ago

    My wife and I are only waiting for our house to be fixed up before we start trying to have children.

  • 10 months ago

    In the end life’s life. You can’t control what happens but you can effect what happens. Having a kid is good. Even if they suffer. No matter what life is the biggest gift of all and if your positive and work hard you and your family will be ok.

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