Anonymous asked in Social SciencePsychology · 1 month ago

Moral dilemma: should I tell my friend that my other friend is obsessed with them? ?

So I’m friends with person A and person B, and person A is obsessed with person B. I’m not going to go super into detail, but person A constantly talks about person B, and goes out of their way to make sure that I don’t spend time with person B so that they can spend as much time with person B as possible. This is usually achieved through causing conflict between me and person B, or through guilt tripping. 

Person A is also extremely dependent on person B, and obsesses over every interaction that they have with person B. This could involve planning it hours in advance, and/or discussing it for hours afterward, analyzing everything that person B said. Recently, it’s been getting worse and I’ve started to feel like person B should know the degree to which person A is obsessed with them, and I don’t feel right keeping this information from them. Should I tell person B, or keep it to myself?

5 Answers

  • 1 month ago

    People make different decisions based on the information they are given. If you don't tell them, or tell them lies they will make different decisions.

    As long as you tell them the truth and probably best to record your conversations with person B to provide evidence to person A, that that's the best you can do.

    If there were a problem and person B has a psychiatric condition it could be devastating and you could be left feeling guilty the rest of your life.

    If you tell them and it ruins your friendships then Person A wasn't really your friend and person B is manipulating you to the point of coercive control.

    If you're unsure just record your conversations with B and take a bit more time. Even let someone unrelated listen and see what an outside perspective has to say.

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  • 1 month ago

    It's none of your business and not your place to go blabbing to anyone about someone else's obsession over them. if you're tired of hearing about how this person is obsessed over someone, tell them you don't want to talk about it anymore.

    • It's infringing on his life and directly involved as his business.

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  • 1 month ago

    You should get rid of person A.

    Avoid him or her.

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  • 1 month ago

    When you play coy with the genders, ages, and other history between the people involved, it becomes impossible to form any clear picture or comment helpfully.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I think it would be the right thing to do if you brought it to their attention so that person B can learn to become more cautious of what they say or do when talking to or hanging out with person A. 

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