Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

Family advice ?

My parents are going through a rough patch right now. Months ago (may of this year) something bad happened and my mom told me that me and her would be moving out. We started to pack and take things off the wall and we found the place that we were going to move into. Then one day my mom caught me crying and I told her I was crying because of what was going on. (I wasn’t crying because I didn’t want to move out, I was crying because of my family being torn apart. I WANTED to move out because I was mad at my dad) she told me that they were gonna try and work things out for me. So now it’s December and we haven’t moved out but things have gotten worse since may. A lot of things have happened since then. My mom is now telling me that we are moving out after Christmas. But she said she has to think about things. I have been begging her for us to move out ever since may. And I really want to move out... how can I get her to move? Neither of us can stay in this situation any longer but she is just so stubborn. I need advice!! Thank you (im 13 btw) 

Updated 1 month ago:

Me and my mom are going to tour a condo/townhouse tomorrow and if it works out.. she’s putting a deposit and we’re moving Jan 1st 

Updated 2 days ago:

Another update sadly. My dad convinced my mom to stay again. I feel so depressed and lost. :( 

5 Answers

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Your mother seems to be trying everything possible to keep your family together. These things don't always go smoothly, in fact they usually don't. So be patient and try to stay out of it as much as you can.

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  • 1 month ago

    You can just talk to her and tell her you love her and she doesn't need to stay in a relationship she isn't happy with. Tell her you'd rather move out with her and move somewhere else where you two can be happier.

    Talk to another adult that you can trust (like your mom's sister if there's any) to talk to your mom. Sometimes adults prefer to take advice from their peers.

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    not much you can do about it unless youre getting abused and then you can call cps

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    She heard you the first time. As she told you, she’s thinking about things. 

    You don’t “get her to move.” You keep her apprised of your feelings and let her do the thinking. 

    She’s the parent, you’re the kid, so keep it that way. The only thing she needs to know about you is what you’re feeling. That’s it.

    You’re not part of their marriage and you never will be. You’re part of the family. If you want her to parent you well, tell her what you’re feeling.  That helps her to know what to do regarding you.

    If you’re scared, tell her you’re scared. Keep her accurately apprised of what you feel. 

    If your dad is abusing you, tell her exactly what he’s doing.

    You’re not supposed to keep each each other strong. She is supposed to keep you strong, and safe.

    • layla1 month agoReport

      I’m in the middle of all this. Me and my mom are supposed to be together and keep each other strong. My dad isn’t only doing bad things against her, he’s also saying bad things to me... I think I have a say in this situation. I just wished they would listen to my side. 

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I don't know what is wrong with parents today, but your mom NEVER should have told you they were trying to make it work because of you.   My brains fell out reading that.   This is a conflict between the 2 of them and it has nothing to do with you.   When she brings you into it, you have no power to change or fix things, so you're stuck in the middle of someone else's mess.   It's also very unfair of her to keep talking about what might happen and then it never does.  Your mom should be doing her thinking and then talk to you, not the other way around.  I'm sure you love her, but she's making some big mistakes here.

    You say you're mad at your dad, but have you tried talking to him?  He can't be that bad if you were crying about your family being torn apart.   If you can't talk to him, try to get mom to see that you've been in limbo since May and it's very tough mentally and emotionally.  She needs to be protecting you from all this, not dragging you into the middle of it.

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