Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 2 months ago

Does everyone's Boyfriend say this when there's an argument?

i dont know if my bf wants to be with me because every time we argue he says he hates me and he dont want to marry me or have a family with me. This makes me really sad, we've been together 3 years. And I already feel like I should atleast have a baby because I want one and I feel like I'm going to be too old if I wait longer. And I really love him and want to be with him. I'm 29 he is 31. He says no other couples fight. 

I don't know what to do. I wanted to get married and have a family. And I told him since the day I met him and he also said he wanted that. And now he always tells me that he doesn't when we argue. I don't know what to do. If we break up I'm never going to have kids. By the time I find someone else, and wait a couple of years to have kids, I'm going to be 40. And it will be too late then. 

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  • LizB
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Oh geez, you're 29, not pushing 40. However, if your boyfriend was ever going to propose, he would have done it already. You weren't high school or college kids when you met, you were already in your mid-late 20s, and if you're not sure about someone after 3 years then you're just wasting everyone's time.

    Face it: your boyfriend doesn't want what you want. Not just that, but he's using all kinds of emotional manipulation that you should not tolerate from ANYONE, least of all the person who is supposed to love you most. I imagine you're scared of starting over when you're almost 30, but being about 10 years older than you I can say that courtships among people in their 30s tend to progress faster than people in their 20s. By the time you're in your 30s you're fairly established in life and know what you want, and have less tolerance for BS. While the dating pool is a bit smaller, it's also easier to narrow down who wants the same things in life that you do and who doesn't. You could easily meet someone and seriously be talking marriage within a year, if it's the right person.

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  • 2 months ago

    If you are arguing then you should not make babies. When people argue then there is a problem in the relationship. Don't bring a baby into that situation. The child will SUFFER

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  • 2 months ago

    Break up right now. I met my husband when I was 30. It was the perfect age to meet him. Break up with your boyfriend who has no intention of getting married. Meet someone else. You're fine.

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  • 2 months ago

    Don't have a baby with this guy. It makes everything worse. If he doesn't want to marry you he won't be happy with you and a baby and then you won't be happy either. You still have plenty of time. If it's not right for both of you it isn't right for either of you. And no. Everyone's boyfriend does not act that way and if you don't know that much about what a normal relationship is you aren't ready for babies.

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  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    No, not everyone's boyfriend says this when there's an argument because it's oddly specific and a lot of people in a relationship don't casually talk about getting married and having a family.

    40 also isn't too old to have a kid, and if you want to have kids it's not like he's the only one. (even if it seems like it)

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  • 2 months ago

    It sounds like you went into the relationship wanting the same things, but he's changed his mind and hasn't bothered to communicate that with you.

    I would suggest sitting down with him and asking what he wants from the relationship and see where you both stand on the marriage/kids issue when the pair of you aren't in the middle of a fight.

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