What can I do if my boyfriend doesn't let me out of our lease?

I've been living with my boyfriend for a little over a year now. We have an apartment together, currently. He's verbally and emotionally abusive towards me and I cannot take it anymore. I have tried my best to improve things, thinking it was all my fault. But he is toxic and refuses to take any responsibility for his actions and how poorly he treats me. He goes off on me over anything he can think of. Working a little late, talking to my mom on the phone, and wanting to buy groceries are just a few of the ridiculous reasons he's gotten verbally abusive towards me before. I come home every day with extreme anxiety because I don't know what kind of mood he will be in, or what will happen that night. His anger issues are out of control and I no longer feel safe. My apartment said I can get of the lease if my boyfriend provides pay stubs proving he can afford it on his own. Which, he can as he makes good pay. There's also a fee for me to be taken off which I can cover on my own. We then need to go to our leasing office to sign a document stating we both agree to let me off. 

It's impossible to reason with him, so what if he refuses to do these things so I can get out?

I know by law, if you have a protective order, you're able to get out of the lease without penalty. But to get that P.O. you need to provide evidence of physical violence to the judge, which I do not have. It's mostly verbal abuse. 

Is there another way I can get out of this lease without harming my credit? 

12 Answers

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  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    I'm sorry but I don't see anything that you've missed in your question, in fact you seem to know more about this than most people.  Anyhow, without a protection order the apartment doesn't have to let you out of the lease.  If you bf went along with it you can apparently get out of the lease per their policy but they don't even have to allow this.  if your bf won't help you out of the lease then you could try simply talking to them again and explaining that you bf is abusive (but not abusive enough that you qualify for a protection order) and that he won't work with you to get you out of the lease (if this becomes the case) but that you will have to leave regardless and ask if they can help you out somehow.  They don't have to to anything more but possibly they'll help you out (let you out with an additional fee, or something) just because its the right thing to do (or possibly they will refuse to do anything more - but no harm in asking).

    Ultimately if you can't get a protection order and your bf won't help you out and the apartment won't let you out then you'll have to either move out and deal with your broken credit later or keep paying on the lease until it is up (whether you live there or not).

    • N V P1 month agoReport

      Can you please answer my question. Need your wise answer. 

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  • 1 month ago

    You will be stuck through the end of the lease.  Your bf was counting on only having to be accountable for half of the rent, when you agreed to room with him and pay the other half.  Behavior is never a part of any contract.  There are different ways that this could turn out.  Give notice to the end off the lease and move out, and continue to pay your half through the end of the lease.  OR, give notice to the end of the lease and move out and don't pay your half - inform your ex bf that you are no longer paying rent as of x date.  He may choose to pay the whole thing.  If he does, you are lucky.  If he chooses to not pay the rent, then you will both be evicted.  This is a risk you will be taking if you choose to stop paying rent, when you are obligated to do so.

    Source(s): Certified Paralegal, with 25+ years' experience & with Landlord & Tenant law experience.
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  • Judy
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If he won't sign, you're stuck with the lease until it expires. Did it go to month to month once you'd been there for a year?

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  • 1 month ago

    By law, the lease can only be changed if EVERYONE on the lease agree, and that includes the landlord, your boyfriend, and you.

    Since you are in an abusive situation there may be exceptions. You need to consult a lawyer who handles domestic abuse situations.

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  • 1 month ago

    you've been there over a year, did you recently sign another yearly lease?  if so, you are stuck unless he physically hurts you according to your state law.

    you can try calling a state domestic violence hotline to see if they know of anything that will help.

    you are free to move out, but have to pay your portion until the lease expires.

    once the lease is expired, you can't be forced to stay on....you notify landlord and co tenant that you are terminating the lease...if they refuse, then you go to court

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  • 1 month ago

    He is not required to cooperate with removing you from the lease & there is nothing you can do to make him.   You can move out but you will remain responsible for the unit.

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  • R P
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    While I commend you for wanting to break your lease the proper way, I have to ask you this - isn't your life & mental well-being more valuable than your credit rating?

    Because I am a landlord, I wouldn't normally advise you to just move out & break your lease. But in your case, that's exactly what I think you should do.  If either the management or your soon-to-be-former BF sues you for rent/damages, your credit will take a hit. But you can rebuild your credit over time.

    Source(s): Florida landlord
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  • Carmen
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    Pray for guidance protection answers help courage wisdom peace of mind and a calm heart research legal options if needed purchase a small undetected camera or recorder as mentioned or use a second cell phone and record conversations his voice etc if you get out this situation never go back be very careful people with these control issues or violent manners can be very dangerous because they don’t care have no natural affection rather see you down than ok .

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  • 2 months ago

    I think what you need to do is contact some 'women's shelter' or something like that. Some organization that helps battered women. Many of those women have been abused as you have been - verbally. Which isn't dismissed as nothing like it used to be. Good luck. And good for you for deciding to remove an abuser from your life. That all said.. I strongly advice that you keep what you're doing to yourself. Consider what you tell him from now on a 'need to know' basis. If he doesn't need to know it - don't tell him.

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  • Sandy
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    figure out a way to record his conversations with you. then take them to the cops and get the order of protection. if it's not enough, move out and go live your mom. she'll understand and help protect you. 

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