From a guys point of view is my boyfriend cheating on me? ?
My boyfriend is a front office manager. His schedule is usually 1pm to 11pm I understand his job can be crazy and might end up working later all I ask is he at least send a text and let me know what’s going on. Lately he has been working until 6am and hasn’t text me all night. His excuse is he “has stuff to do” or his “phone died” even though I see him active on social media. On top of him working super late and not communicating with me and giving not great excuses I found out he has been liking provocative pictures of girls continuously. If I ever were to like one picture of a half naked guy my boyfriend would freak out. And when I mentioned it to him he said he was gaming with this girl who he likes half naked pictures and was having late night conversations with her while I was sleeping. He said it was nothing and just gaming and liking pictures means nothing yet he would flip out if I did what he is doing. I just don’t have a great feeling from a guys perspective does is seem like he’s messing around or cheating on me?
- River EuphratesLv 72 months ago
It definitely sounds like something's up - he may not actually be cheating on you, but it may only be because the opportunity hasn't actually presented itself.
If it were me, I would probably be doing a little bit of detective work to see if he's actually where he says he is, who he's with, and what he's doing - of course, by the time you have to start doing that, it doesn't bode well for the relationship.
- Barb OuthereLv 72 months ago
"...yet he would flip out if I did what he is doing..." so its OK for him to do it to you? Whether he is actually cheating or not, you might want to rethink this relationship with him since he holds himself to a different standard than he expects from you.
Add to that the fact you KNOW he is deliberately lying to you "hasn’t text me all night. His excuse is he “has stuff to do” or his “phone died” even though I see him active on social media".
Then he is "having late night conversations with her while I was sleeping."?
Girl, I hate to say it, but it seems he is just not that into you. Sorry.
- JerryLv 62 months ago
I'm with David B on this. Whether he's cheating or not, a guy who can't be bothered to let you know he's working late is a guy not worth bothering with, a guy who sets double standards like "It's OK for me to amuse myself with flirtations, but don't you dare do it" is a guy not worth bothering with.
- AnaLv 62 months ago
I would recommend you politely ask him to see a paper copy of his work hours, and also his paycheck to make sure the hours add up correctly.
If he’s actually being paid to work until 5 or 6 in the morning, then he’s fine, he’s being faithful.
But if he refuses to show you his time stamps or paycheck... or if he gets mad or calls you crazy etc... then he’s a cheater and is just trying to shame/bully you into silence.
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- Obi Wan KnievelLv 72 months ago
From anyone's perspective, he just might be cheating on you. Forget all that other stuff, because you mentioned that he would freak out if you liked one picture of a guy on social media. That indicates serious jealousy, and excessive jealousy is a huge red flag when it comes to cheating. That's true with males and females.
My ex girlfriend (lovingly known as Satan) was insanely jealous. She was also a serial cheater. Most of the girls who cheated on me (there were more than a few) were also jealous types. A couple of my male buddies are obsessively jealous with their significant females, and they're habitual cheaters. And it's not just me, ask anyone who was cheated on if their cheating lover was overly jealous. They'll tell you the same thing.
All the other examples you listed are a solid maybe / maybe not, because having the opportunity to cheat is not the same as cheating. Working long hours and / or outside (not 9 - 5) shifts doesn't mean anything, nor does working with lots of attractive people. Nobody cheats because they got tricked into it or suddenly forgot they're in a relationship, people only cheat because they want to.
But the jealous thing is definitely a warning sign.
- David B.Lv 72 months ago
Whether he is or isn't doesn't really matter. His lack of honesty and disregard for your feelings should though, in my opinion. If I were your father my advice would be to leave this guy before he does any further damage to your self-esteem and sense of self-worth. It's pretty hard to maintain either when the person that claims to love you treats you like you are an idiot!