Wondering if I should move on from this friend?
Friendship going on 7 years, We’re both 21 & in totally different places in life. I have a car, license, money saved up, & have goals in life I would like to reach. This friend has a 1 year old. Has no car, no license, but she is moved out with her bf & has no money saved up except for $200-400 give or take. She asks to hang out admitting she has no money saved up but saying we should hang out (why do I have to be responsible for paying for **** I don’t want to do to begin with & take you places that you want to go?) I want to hang out with her but I always have to take her ******* kid bc no one can watch the brat (I don’t like kids if you couldn’t tell) I see kids as a legal liability if I got in a wreck. She knew what the risks were of having a child this young in life, but then she complains how she has no money (she has 2 jobs) I have a full time job and am actively trying to put money towards my financial goals. I feel like she’s just trying to use me to take her places? I don’t feel like I need to pick her and her kid up in MY car that’s in MY name that I pay for. But at what point do I stop holding her hand & attempting to motivate her and just let her fail? I’ve tried for years and look at where she is. I just don’t want to be used for my resources. Am I a bad person for wanting to not hang out with her because she doesn’t have the resources I do & her life is different from mine?
I’m her only friend so she’s constantly being clingy & texting & calling when I’m at work & when I’m trying to sleep for work. She also acts like a high schooler looking for drama on social media. I don’t deal well with drama I have my own goals and stuff to do in life. She’s always been the person that’s all bark no bite.
- PatriciaLv 73 weeks ago
Why do you bother with her, if you dislike her so much? I wouldn't.
- Anonymous3 weeks ago
You're a straight up ASSHOLE and she would be better off without you. You're the worst excuse for a "friend" that I've ever seen.
- FoofaLv 73 weeks ago
Actually she should move on from you but it doesn't really matter who instigates it, as long as you remain separate.
- Coach SimonLv 73 weeks ago
Do her a favour and let her alone. Maybe she thinks that there are more important things than money. Let her fail? Is she failing as a mother? How would you know anyway? Perhaps her written English is better than yours.
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- RobertLv 63 weeks ago
She made choices and must live with them. You owe her nothing. If you don't want to hang out with her don't. If you want to see her but do not want to pay for a lot of things, get together at her place or at your place and have an inexpensive afternoon. But be true to you first. Your didn't knock her up and you didn't force her to do all the wrong things. You owe her nothing.
- zenoLv 63 weeks ago
Maybe a comprise would work. Only visit her
At her place for a while and leave. Maybe once
Or twice A week but that is about it. Travel plans
Are a pick and chose or no thanks situation.
You have to draw your own guide lines in this
Area. Maybe one or two trips a month. Or a
Few times a year. The exact number is up to