Is there anyone in your family with a life threatening illness and/or disability?

Close relatives. How does someone deal with something like that emotionally, financially and with the hardships that come with it?

7 Answers

  • Ann
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    My son's wife has brain cancer.  It is a terrible blow to our family because we care a great deal for her, but everyone has taken on a role and rallies around her.  Their church members sit with her in shifts so my son can go to work.  Her sister-in-law has organized a Meal Train, for people to bring in dinners for them. I go over and do laundry.  My husband has lent them his car, which is lower to get into than their SUV, for her to go to dr. appts. and therapy. My son can lift her into it.  Her friends from work and their neighborhood organized a benefit to help with some of the medical costs, which presently are over $250,000 and on-going.  We just take it one day at a time.  It is emotionally hard on everyone, but we remain calm around her and encourage any little progress she makes. Their medical insurance unbelievably has denied so much coverage, that they will never get everything paid off.  They are paying a little at a time to each provider.  They have too many assets to be considered for financial assistance.  As long as they pay something, at least they're showing good faith in attempting to pay.  That's their biggest worry.  The fact that people are supportive and continue to rally around them is comforting.   

  • 2 weeks ago

    My parents and lots of aunts and uncles died within a few years of each other a while ago. You just have to learn to deal with it, or it'll make you crazy.

    I'm old. I'm dying. I'm not sure when, but I'm dying. You are, too. Live life while you can.

  • Judith
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    I have a sister who is in the early stages of dementia.  She is 71.  So far she can do mostly everything - except drive.  She was having too many accidents so gave up driving.  I drove her around yesterday to do several errands and told her I'd be glad to do it twice a month.  I will also be available to drive her other places if she needs it but she has some good friends who are divvying up other driving needs.

    I volunteered to drive her places; I didn't wait for her to ask.  As her condition worsens I and my other sisters will step in and take it as it comes.  My mother, sisters and I get together for breakfast once in awhile and I'm thinking it would be a good time to have a serious discussion about the future - after the holidays.  We shouldn't wait until she can no longer make decisions herself in regards to her care.

    She's a pretty practical person - she gave up driving and sold her car - no one told her she had to do that.  She once lived in a condo and received one bill too many from the association (her share of something which needed doing was $5000 - how much each condo owner paid was dependent upon the size of the condo).  She realized she could no longer afford to live there so she didn't waste any time selling the condo and moving to a place she could afford - with no surprises.

    So I'm confident that she'll know when she can no longer live alone and will know when she would need assisted living; she has the income to cover that.

  • 2 weeks ago

    there is nobody now but my grandad died from cancer that spread all over his body. for a long time after he was diognosed he was completly fine, i didnt even know how long he was ill until years after he died. once it started getting worce it happened fast. my gran became his carer and i was kep away from him as everyone decided that since i was so close to him it would be best if i didnt see him like that so i would remember him how he was. i only saw him once while he was ill

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  • reme_1
    Lv 7
    3 weeks ago

    You ask for help. My father died in a hospital after 6 months, my mother suffered from dementia, my brother has multiple serios health issues, I am dealing with severe arthritis which has taken away my mobility. My sister has a digestive disorder.

  • I am. The danger is currently passed, but could reappear any second. I have only 20% circulation in my legs. I have venous insufficiency and peripheral artery disease. I have a wound that has been there for three years - currently not infected and finally beginning to heal.  A month ago they were considering amputating my legs, but with my blood flow issues, a heart attack and stroke in January they ruled surgery out.

    I am sleeping a lot. But also awake when I want to be asleep. So I started taking CBD gummies to help me sleep at night. 

    I'm taking cymbalta because its quite depressing dealing with what I am. My family understands that some days I just can't manage and go off the deep end.

    I am using a cross training machine 4 times a day It is helping to get my blood circulating and healing my wound.

    I am trying to find projects I can do. I set genealogy goals. I set goals to rekindle relationships. I'm trying to help my son lose weight. I'm giving things away to people I hope will treasure them as much as I have. 

    I'm getting my online medical degree LOL.  I research all the ailments I have and look for new solutions.

    I changed my health insurance to something with more reasonable copays for all my specialists. The premium is higher, But I save that and more on lower copays.

    I am getting meals on wheels. It is actually cheaper than trying to buy the food myself.I don't drive anymore and getting to the grocery store is torturous.

    I'm saving money because I don't get out so I don't shop. Online shopping I use only for necessities. So no splurge buying or retail therapy.

    I spent all the money I planned to used for my old age to renovate my house into something fully accessible, so I wouldn't be forced into a nursing home.

    Most days I cope pretty well. Friday everything that happened seemed like a catastrophe. Some days I hurt a lot. I try to only take 1 or 2 oxys a week.  My legs will be amputated if they hurt too much or my wound gets gangrene again. 

  • 3 weeks ago

    just go out, and find away. keep the faith, always pray..

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