Anonymous asked in HealthMental Health · 3 weeks ago

I'm never going to get out of this?

I've been majorly depressed for over 5 years. I'm 21 now, and I've been majorly depressed since I was 16. The last 5 years of my life have been on pause. All I've done is just sit in my room for the past 5 years doing absolutely nothing else. I've had no friends, no boyfriends, no experiences, nothing. The last 5 years of my life have been blank. And I feel like I'm never going to get out of this. My parents say they're going to help me but they never do, they just let my life pass by. I feel trapped in my body. I want to go to counseling and get better but I just can't do it. I can't just get up and do it. I'm trapped. I wish I could just get up and do it but I can't. The medication doesn't work. Nothing works. I'm never going to get out of this. And I doubt counseling would do anything anyway. All I do is lay in bed and eat I don't want to be like this, but I'm emotionally paralyzed and I can't do anything. I just can't.

5 Answers

  • 3 weeks ago

    If you could win a prize by hitting a target with an arrow and the arrows were free, what would you say to someone who asked you, "How many arrows do you want?" You wouldn't say, "Which is the best one?" You'd say, "How many can I have?"

    The beauty of self-help is that you have a variety of low cost, low risk things that can be combined with each other, and with standard treatments with office visits. While it's not clear at this time that any one of these things is as effective as an antidepressant, it's common sense that if a variety of reasonably good things are combined with each other, they will have considerable effect. 

    I'll tell you about the variety of helpful things, but first I want to say this.

    As you know, motivation is very important.    

     There's something very important to understand - the difference between motivation and energy.  

    People say, "I know there are things that will make me feel better - getting exercise, taking care of myself, straightening up the house and cleaning, but I'm depressed and I don't have the energy." The thing is, people do have energy when they're depressed - as much energy as they always do, but for some reason, the system is reluctant to let you use your energy.

    We have to use psychology to coax energy out of our systems. Psychology has some nifty tricks. I'll tell you some.

     This is a motivation trick that's been used in behavior modification programs since the 1930s. If a task seems like it's too big, think of it as a series of tasks that you can take on one at a time, and start with something really, really easy. Cleaning - start by cleaning for 3 or 4 min and take a 5 min break. Then clean longer intervals, still taking 5 min breaks. Homework - start by proofreading a paper or by previewing a chapter you're about to read.

    A famous psychiatrist said that when we can't control our feelings we can still control our muscles. If you tell your arms and legs to get you to the bathroom for a shower, they will obey.

    Try this when it seems that you're too tired to work. Lie on the couch, close your eyes, and get ready to work by imagining yourself working for 5 minutes. Again, think in terms of taking it step by step and starting with something really easy.

    This answer has info about a variety of things, standard treatments and self-help. It got 5 stars from somebody who was called a hopeless case by therapists.

  • 3 weeks ago

    What we believe in this life we make true... so if you "can't" and "nothing helps" that's how things are going to stay.

    Self-help works just as well as therapy - probably better. But it takes effort to use it. There are self help websites for depression all over the internet. Maybe you could start there.

    I also suggest self help for self-esteem and/or self-confidence.

    There are also guided meditations on youtube for healing -- these are two good ones:

    Youtube thumbnail


    Youtube thumbnail


    These guided meditations are best listened two at night when you go to bed. I use my phone and ear buds. They are helpful

    There are many more on YouTube

  • 3 weeks ago

    Look, you were able to type this and so, yes, you can do something.

    You are a grown woman now and not a child and so any medical or psychiatric care you get will have to be of your own choice.

    I seriously believe you would benefit from psychiatric hospitalization....seriously.

    You need an inpatient comprehensive program if you truly want to get over this and become functional and independent.

    Your parents aren't doing you any favor by continuing to support and care for you while you stay in your room.  They are actually endorsing your illness and enabling you.  And this is one really good reason why inpatient hospitalization is necessary.

    You can talk to whomever prescribes your medication for you or you can look in the phone book and call the intake number at your nearest psychiatric hospital and have your parents take you there or call an ambulance.

    But seriously, this is going to go o and on and on until you do something about it.

  • 3 weeks ago

    in times of depression, people can do so much then it is down to you to do the rest and help yourself.

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  • 3 weeks ago

    Merry Christmas my friend

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