Phil asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 3 weeks ago

How to get help for mentally ill family  member ?

In the black community often mental health is swept under the rug by our people. I've been a victim of this my entire life... My grandma will not go get the help shes needed for decades. It has destroyed our whole family. She isolated everyone (I think this was means for her to never feel alone, has to be in control of everything none of us were allowed to work, weren't  allowed to socialize, she also made everyone have to be a servant of her and depend on everything from her including driving, making appointments. She even did this to my grandpa and though he never shows it I know he's tired of it. Then she talks about all of us to eachother, belittles everyone makes comparisons  of herself to everyone to live by those standards. I'm honestly embarrassed  of her in public she thinks people are out to get her, don't get me wrong she's highly intelligent and a lot of the things she speaks are brilliant but humanity isn't ready for  the things she says yet. I try to tell her not to say certain things out in public because people are judgemental. She's getting worse and it  breaks my heart to see because she's all I've ever known as a parent but the abuse that comes with it is pushing me to the edge. I have my own child now and my own life to try to live shes used to me being a little kiss *** and doing everything she says but now I speak up to defend myself she goes bizerk and says I'm a disrespectful *****. 

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    You know, you can always call your local police to do a welfare check on a relative you believe is mentally ill. I know that isn't popular in the "black community" either, but it's the most effective way to force someone who's ill into care.

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    3 weeks ago

    not much you can do but if youre underage and shes being abusive call cps, if older move out

  • 3 weeks ago

    I am White and my Mom is the same way. I wish I had a answer but I don't.

    I have begged Dad to get her help but he won't. Good luck and I know exactly

    how you feel.

  • 3 weeks ago

    Honey, she's been this way for "decades"? Refused help the entire time? You can't get her to help now, or ever.  The best you can do is protect yourself and those close to you (your child). You don't have to cater to her demands, or do anything else , for that matter. Do what's good for you and yours, and the rest of the family will have to make their own choices and decisions in these matters, just as you have to do. But your example may help to encourage them toward making healthier choices. Good wishes, 

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  • Anonymous
    3 weeks ago

    This is just so sad.  I am white, not black, and my grandmother slid into senility when she was in her mid 70's.  I don't that my family was any more willing to see things for what they were than your family is.

    I asked my Grandmother to see a Physician, and she agreed (because I was concerned for my child when he was in her company), they had a very good conversation following a very thorough physical and mental exam, and she was placed in medication which she took.

    I agree.  It's heartbreaking to watch, but you can't force help on people who don't want to be helped.

    I'm so sorry.

    • Phil3 weeks agoReport

      Thank you for your response  I'm so happy for your grandmother  

  • 3 weeks ago

    i dont think you can but if shes being abusive stay away from her

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