Anonymous asked in HealthDiseases & ConditionsDiabetes · 9 months ago

What are some ways to comfort a dying family member?

I'm only 12, but I really wanted to get this off my chest. My mother has type two diabetes and has severe nerve pain. Her fingers have gone numb and also her feet. She says she would rather die than get her fingers and feet amputated. I'm so scared that I can't even get through normal activites.. I know that she isn't going to last much longer. What are some ways of comforting her? If she's going to go, I want her to die peacefully with love.


I would just like to say that it isn't just nerve pain. If it was only nerve pain, I wouldn't be as worried. She has tons of conditions that have bunched up over the years, some I don't even know about. Thank you for helping anyways, it's like therapy.

5 Answers

  • D_21
    Lv 5
    9 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    Are there any stories she likes to tell? Perhaps memories she likes sharing with you? Favorite jokes she's always saying? I encourage you to spend time with her. Maybe ask if you can video or audio record her telling her favorites. Look at photo albums or pictures together. Do crafts together. Make memories.

    When her time draws near, you can retell her favorite stories to her. Talk about your favorite times with her. What you think of when her name is mentioned. Talk about any special places you go together, or trips you've taken. Maybe hint at an inside joke you two share. 

    The things she's said a million times, say those. Show you were listening. Let her know you'll remember. Tell her you love her.

    What's her favorite smell? Are there flowers you could get , brownies you could bake together, or a candle someone could buy?

    Talk to her and your dad now about how you feel. Grief is a unique journey that we all experience at some point. Everyone travels it their own way. You guys will figure it out together.

    It might be a bit morbid, but if you are curious about death...there's a woman named Caitlin Doughty, who is a book author and funeral director. Her books are available on and popular enough most libraries have them. She has a youtube channel also. She answers questions people have about what happens with bodies after someone dies, about cemeteries, and funerals.

    You may wish not to think about it and that's okay too. If you are curious just search for her on google or youtube.

  • 9 months ago

    Type 2 is treatable. With Type 1 parts fall off.

  • Tulip
    Lv 7
    9 months ago

    She isn't going to die of nerve pain. The nerve pain is HER fault for poorly caring for her diabetes. There are good medicines that can be used for that.

  • 9 months ago

    i would try to encourage her not to eat the stuff she shouldnt be eating

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  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    You're jumping the gun, kid. You're mom isn't dying just because she has Diabetes and some peripheral neuropathy.  Amputations only occur if there are wounds or blood circulation problems in the limb, not nerve loss.  She's scared, sure, but she shouldn't be talking like that around her kids. The doctors will give her as much care as they are able, and if she follows her doctor's orders she should be able to prevent the possibility of amputation as much as anyone can.

    At this point in your life, just try not to cause her any extra trouble, she has enough to do  without you causing her any extra worry.

    If the time comes and she is actually on her death bed, you just talk to her, hold her hand, maybe sing her favorite songs quietly. Helping someone you love pass away is not easy, but it can be a peaceful, loving experience.

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