Is my boyfriend cheating ?
So this is a fresh relationship (2 months) and we have been getting intimate. He bought a new box of condoms the other day and we only used one. Tonight I noticed that there was another one missing. On a side note, he works long hours during the day, goes to bed early and texts and calls me in between and I see him every night after work. But anyways, I confronted him about it and he said that he used it for himself so he didn’t make a mess masturbating. Is this normal? Should I be suspicious? I don’t want to cause any problems if he didn’t do anything wrong. He hasn’t given me a reason up until now not to trust him.
- AnaLv 69 months agoFavorite Answer
Try checking his phone sometime. Don’t come to conclusions until you get more evidence.
Also, make sure your relationship is PUBLICLY listed on Facebook, on his page.
Check his Facebook from some other random person‘S (not your’s) Facebook account. His Facebook should say “in a relationship with YOUR NAME” to everyone... not just you. It should be public.
If your relationship with him isn’t public or it doesn’t say YOUR NAME as to who he’s dating... then that’s a huge red flag and you need to ask him why.
You see, if you and him establish publicly to the entire world that you’re dating... then if he cheats, it makes him a bad guy and a scumbag and it makes you an angel and a victim. However, if he’s “keeping you a secret” then if you get mad about him “cheating” you’ll just look crazy to the world bcuz everybody will be like “ummm, I didn’t know they were dating. Maybe she was just his friends with benefits who was disgruntled he didn’t only date her.” So you need to make HIM establish to his entire friends and work base, that he’s publicly in a committed relationship with YOU. On Facebook.
If he says “oh I don’t air my business on Facebook” or “I don’t use Facebook like that” or some similar BS fake excuse, then dump him immediately, RUN AWAY, because what he’s really communicating is “I don’t respect you or even like you, I’m just using your p*ussy hole for some fun”. Sorry to be so harsh but it’s the truth.
Do I think his excuse for the condom is most likely bullsh*t? Yeah. However, it’s not unheard of for a guy to do that out of curiosity if he’s younger.
Regardless- sometimes men make a mistake and cheat BUT they actually do like/love the girl, and in which case, if you confront him and get on his a*ss, he will shape up for you. (My now-husband of 2 years, shaped up about 3 years ago before we got married. He hasn’t cheated AT ALL since we got married and believe me, I have full access to his phone and can even see his phone history and we share bank account info. MEN CAN SHAPE UP IF THEY TRULY LOVE YOU. But if he just doesn’t love or respect you or value you, then you shouldn’t even waste your time trying to change him, that would be an idiotic use of your time and it’ll never be successful.)
But, like, if he doesn’t respect you or value you at all, and he wants to “hide you” from public view, then that’s when you know you mean absolutely nothing to him- and therefore you stand no chance of changing him- so you should end it now before you waste any more of your valuable time.
A guy who’s proud to show you off, and who likes you a lot, can realize the pain of you dumping him or threatening to dump him, so he can realize (in his mind) that you’re worth more than other girls.
But a guy who just sees you as a dirty little secret side piece, a guy who won’t even make your relationship public on Facebook, is never ever gonna commit to only you, ever.
Don’t delude yourself into thinking “Facebook doesn’t matter”- IT TOTALLY MATTERS. Only girls who are used for sex only convince themselves that it doesnt.
- FoofaLv 79 months ago
I have heard of this but after just two months you're taking some risks by "confronting" him. Most couples aren't even monogamous at this early stage and he might decide you're a jealous psycho if you persist.
- Anonymous9 months ago
Well, I recall using a condom once for masturbation, but it was strictly because I was young and curious how it felt. But his excuse sounds lame to me, so Id be suspicious if I were you.
- Anonymous9 months ago
That's a lie I'm telling you right now