I told my gay friend that I was bi, and it was a mistake?

I told my gay friend that I was bi because I thought I'd be able to trust him since we both relate. Over the last few months, he's been letting it slip. He'll make jokes and references about me that he thinks are subtle, but really they are very obvious. The other day, we were at a party together and he was telling a story. I chimed in to add to it, and he finished it by screaming "but we're both gay!".  Theres been many cases when he's been drunk and would blurt it out as well. I can't exactly drop him as a friend since we're still in school together and all my friends are his. I'm also worried that if I did drop him, it'd give him more reason to out me. I don't know what to do about this. I'm not ready for people to know this about me, and even if I was, it's not his story to tell. What should I do?

4 Answers

  • reme_1
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago
    Favorite Answer

    CAll the gay center and talk to the counselor. Meet other teens who are gay, out or not. You need to become strong inside- to be able to handle al the B S in the real world. THen when some dufus outs you, you will be strong enough to deal with it. Get involved with the LGBT community. Meet some OUT gay adults too- to have someone in your corner if you need help.

    Are your parents supportive? Do they even know. Once they know and are behind you, you'll be able to deal with most any thing. If you haven't told them, get info from PFLAG.org- a wonderful support group made up mostly of parents with LGBT kids who reach out to other parents. They can help your parents.

    YOu shouldn't have to be fearful of being outed at school. DO you have a gay club? Do you have a safe room with a supportive teacher? If your parents get behind you they can pressure the principal to make some changes, for the better.

    I wish you well. Back off from this jerk. He no longer respects you. Dump him - now or later . Don't wait too long as he will hurt you. HUGS from a SENIOR lesbian

  • Logan
    Lv 4
    3 weeks ago

    You can act along with the joke and people will just think he's joking. Or you can tell him you're not out and he needs to stop making jokes about you and telling people.

  • 4 weeks ago

    You'll have to confide in him that you aren't ready for people to know about your sexuality.

    If he can't respect that, then he's not your friend - and if he tries to out you for ditching him, then  he's a complete a-hole.

  • 4 weeks ago

    I say you should confront him and tell him that you’re not comfortable with being outed like that and that you want to come out on your own accord. If that doesn’t work, then I just advise trying to disconnect from him a bit more. I’m so proud of you for coming out, even if it was to a few people or maybe just him 💓 you are loved 

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