Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 4 weeks ago

How can you tell if someone is giving you constructive criticism or just being negative and rude to get a reaction from you?

Just wondering, because I know it's possible for some haters to avoid appearing blatantly negative.  Sometimes they can be very manipulative and subtle with the language.  They might want to seem like they are being "helpful" but at times it just might not feel that way.

9 Answers

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    It's all in the way it's said. Saying "You stink" is different from saying "Maybe you should take a shower today".

  • Dv8s
    Lv 7
    3 weeks ago

    It depends on how you take the constructive criticism, and whom the criticism is from.

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    3 weeks ago

    you could probably tell after you get to know that person

  • reme_1
    Lv 7
    3 weeks ago

    Listen to what they are saying... does it make sense to you or does it seem that they are just ragging on you.

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    rude ones always say constructive but YOU know that it isn't ..and they know it isn't . 

  • Linda
    Lv 6
    4 weeks ago

    If it seems rude it probably is. You cannot always tell but how it makes you feel afterwards is a good indication of the intent behind their words. Also how do they treat you the majority of the time? Respectful or not? 

  • joedlh
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    You left out a third alternative: posturing. It might not be constructive criticism and it may not be an attempt to demean you. Perhaps the critic is seeking admiration and standing from others in the room and you're just the unwitting basis for it.

    To get an idea about the motives, look to what was actually said. Does it ring true? Is the critic authoritative, meaning does he or she have the credentials and experience to make the comments?

    As others have stated, however, if they're really good at it you won't be able to tell.

  • Justin
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    Yes, this is called 'passive aggression.' 

    It usually shows up in the after effects of a person's influence. Generally, it is worse than simply being aggressively mean since it contains just as much negativity while also being shockingly unexpected because of the nice 'mask' it wears, first disarming its intended victims before stabbing them in the back. 

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    If they do it well, you can't. 

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