Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 1 month ago

Should I just keep my mouth shut?

I was with a group of friends when a friend of mine said he had an announcement to make. He said he was getting married. We all congratulated him and ask him who his bride was. He told us and it brought back memories of the time I had dated his bride to be many years ago. I was happy to see she was getting married and would settle down. She is a VERY nice person.

Then he said he was VERY LUCKY to find someone that was the same religion as he was and MOST IMPORTANT TO HIM she was a virgin like he was.

That set off an alarm in my head. I know from personal experience she was NOT a virgin. She was not a virgin when I dated her and unless you can become a virgin again, she was not one now.

My first thought that since it so important to him was to tell him I knew she was not a virgin but I had second thoughts and didn’t say anything. If after he is married and he finds out I knew she was not a virgin which is unlikely, I know he will be mad at me. I don’t want to cause him or his future bride any problems as I don’t think a girl’s sexual past should matter but it does to him.

Should I tell him or just keep my mouth shut and hope he never finds out about her past

8 Answers

  • Alan H
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Really, it is not your business,

    Unless you had sex with her you cannot be sure she is not a virgin

    She may have wanted you to think she was experienced

    Say nothing

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    Sounds like he has no respect for her anyways since he's bragging to everyone about her virginity. Whether or not she's a virgin is irrelevant,  the fact is HE is no good. 

  • 1 month ago

    Tell him exactly what you just told us. If he's really your friend, he'll understand, in time and forgive you. 

  • Teal
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    I think it would be appropriate to tell him you dated her in the past, though your sex life is none of his business. It's not a secret, and it's better that he hears it from you than through gossip. Whatever else he manages to figure out on his own is not your problem. Really it's a bad sign for their marriage that she is lying to him and he thinks her virginity is a top priority. They have a lot of baggage they need to unpack.

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  • 1 month ago

    It has really nothing to do with you. It is between the two of them. And maybe he knows already but lies about it and don’t want anyone to know and is protecting her. Maybe he’s not a virgin himself ? Who knows. They are very personal and private things you don’t want others to know or to talk about. So yes, don’t talk about it with him, or with others. You don’t want to be that person who’s spreading this kind of news. Nobody will appreciate that. Honestly....

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    You should tell him! Everyone deserves there goals and what-nots! If he doesn't believe you, Try to explain better. If that doesn't work. It's his fault for not listening. 

  • Mark
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If she is "very nice", why would you say anything?

  • 1 month ago

    What does it matter either way? And if he's the sort of man who announces he's marrying a v. he deserves to have a nasty shock in the future.

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