How to spice it up(in the bedroom)?

We’ve been together for five years, so I know things slow down a little bit over time. He’s a little older than me and before him I had only been with one guy. He’s a little more experienced than that. So for me, I don’t always know what to do to initiate sex. It used to be as easy as me sending nude photos while he was at work or even videos. Or just walking around in nothing but a T-shirt. It doesn’t seem to work that easy anymore. I always imagine scenarios that will really turn him on, like going in for a ******* when he’s relaxing after work. But he gets home and talks about how tired he is and I get discouraged. I know he’s attracted to me, I know there isn’t underlying relationship issues, I think I just need to spice it up. I’m looking for encouragement and ideas! Do you think even being exhausted from work that I should try to initiate some sexy time confidently? Are men okay with that generally or is saying “I’m exhausted” really a good indication that you just want to be unbothered? What are things I should do?

5 Answers

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  • 4 weeks ago

    Do you have a job? Finished your education? Are you busy doing anything that makes YOU exhausted occasionally? It's doubtful that he's wanting you to be his little sex toy endlessly .. but you, apparently, want him to be your on-clue maintenance man.

    Maybe working on interesting conversations and lots of laughter would spice things up. Everybody likes to laugh. Do you two do OTHER things together?

    During the dry times in my marriage, I found that surprise outside sex was appreciated. Also sex in unusual places. Once, for an entire year, I outlawed sex in the bedroom but sex just about everywhere else could be tried.

    • history
      Lv 7
      4 weeks agoReport

      I didn't mean it that way. My marriage improved a great deal once I decided to finish college and pursued interests of my own. That got his attention.

  • 4 weeks ago

    He’s probably getting the sex from somewhere else

    • Vegas
      Lv 6
      4 weeks agoReport

      Solid advice 😂 I forgot all men are primal beasts who’s feelings and thoughts shouldn’t be considered, I should first assume he’s having sex with someone else and damage my relationship 🤷‍♀️

  • Me
    Lv 6
    4 weeks ago

    Have you waited for him to get home and have something sexy on for him so you're the first thing he sees when he walks in the door? Like sexy lingerie??

  • 4 weeks ago

    Two things come to mind. The first is to encourage him to get a complete physical. It could be that his exhaustion is related to a lack of certain vitamins and minerals. You might consider ordering him some of this.

    https://umzu.com/pages/redwood-sales-page?gclid=Cj...

    The second is to appeal to his basic senses. Besides his eyes, his sense of smell would be next in line. Consider getting a new perfume that he might find appealing.

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    He's got a side chick. What you'll have to do is pack.

    • David B.
      Lv 7
      4 weeks agoReport

      Congratulations on being the first creep to take a swipe at someone just because you can. What a coward!

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