Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 4 weeks ago

I don’t want to marry him but I’m scared I’m too old to find someone else ?

I’m 30 years old I’m about to be 31 in December. I’m engaged and I’ve realize that my fiancé is not the man I want to marry. We have too many differences and his recent comment of “I plan to support the kids but not you.” and how he wished his ex gf did not have a miscarriage (they were 19) because at least then he wouldn’t be 32 without a kid has me very concerned. 

I want to end my engagement but a lot of my friends are telling me to just marry him because it’s going to be very very hard for me to find (preferably) a non divorced man without a child at the age of 31/32. I’ve been with my fiancé for 6 years and I’m very scared to start over at 31. Any advice? Am I too old to start over? 

6 Answers

  • Teal
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago
    Best Answer

    It doesn't sound like he wants to marry you either, he just wants a child and also feels like he sunk too much time in the relationship to start over. After you do give him children, what is his incentive to stick around? He can support them like he planned and be the fun weekend dad. Dating at 31 is a lot easier than dating at 40 with young children. He has nothing to offer you that is worth wasting any more of your time and derailing your life. You already know what you need to do.

    Get better friends. Nobody who cares for you would tell you to settle for a loveless marriage with someone who is throwing up so may red flags. They backhandedly called you a loser who can't do better, I don't think these people respect you very much.

  • 4 weeks ago

    You are not too old to start over. No true "friend" encourages someone to get married to someone they don't want to marry. These are not your friends, and this is not the right person for you to commit your life to.

  • 4 weeks ago

    Don't settle. If you marry him, you will only end up being single again when the marriage ends. You're not too old to start over.

  • kristy
    Lv 6
    4 weeks ago

    You can find someone else. Don’t worry

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  • 4 weeks ago

    So don't marry him. Marry a guy for all the right reason not the wrong reason. Really, you think you too old to start over try 39. It stinks. A good portion of all the women are single mothers. They are too hung up on their kids to realize a great guy that's willing to love her and her kids. I would dearly love to find a good looking single lady so we could travel the world and i could actually fall in love with her.

  • LizB
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    So you'd rather be married and miserable and humiliated daily by your spouse than single and a bit lonely, but with your dignity intact? Do you realize how messed up that sounds?

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