Anonymous

I always feel like an outsider because of how I grew up. How do I change my perspective?

I grew in Black American neighborhood and school and my friends and their family as my main cultural influence without my parent ever around. I'm white but adapted to my environment but feel like I have no culture of my own. Some people in my community accepted me, others never did because I was white. Can't tell by how I carry myself now but I overcame poverty, abuse, drug use, homelessness thanks to mentors. I completely turned my life around. Hpwever, I don't feel like I belong anywhere. I lost my friends once I turned my life around. While I can relate on a basic level, I struggle to REALLY relate to white people. In black spaces, I am always constantly reminded of the fact the I'm white and keep having the unwanted thought that "no one wants me here". What can I do to stop defaulting to feeling like the "other" in every and any community?

Update:

@Brother X, never said that I think I'm black, that's ridiculous. I am talking about CULTURAL SOLIDARITY. I am white and privileged, which is true. BUT that's all I ever will be to most people, no matter what I have lived through. My perspective means nothing in that circle. And if I speak my mind around white people, they get uncomfortable when I call out racism or privilege. I just feel like I can't please anyone with who I am. Trying to "act white" is pretty much my default these days.

2 Answers

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  • 4 weeks ago

    "In black spaces, I am always constantly reminded of the fact the I'm white and keep having the unwanted thought that "no one wants me here"

    Well, that's not a thought we cause you to have. It's not us who practice race discrimination. My people never told your people you couldn't enter a public school. We didn't tell you you couldn't vote. We didn't stop you from entering any restaurant so if you feel like no one wants you in our community that's on you. As you said, we raised you and there was no issue then so why is there one now?

    Look at Sister Nkechi aka Rachael Dolezal, we didn't cast her out we welcomed her.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    Why do you have to deal with anyone?

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