Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

An online friend has an abuse father. What should I do?

I met a friend online from a dating app. We really clicked and got to know each other fast. She later admitted that her father physically and sexually abuses her and physically accuses other people in her family. She told me he has touched her and even made her suck him once. She has not told the police because she still loves her abuser. She is mad at her mother who doesn't abuse her and has told her about the sexual abuse but her mother doesn't believe her. I do not know where they live except what state they're in. Her mom is aware of the physical abuse and he does use a belt. I want to make her safe but don't know what to do. She is only a young teenager and so am I. 

5 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Best Answer


    This is a tricky one, she hasn't gone to the police over it and you've never met her in person. It seems like she doesn't want to cause a break up in the family/send her father to prison, but at the same time, she doesn't like the abuse.

    You, however, can't be entirely sure she is genuine. Maybe you've had a live video call, but otherwise, you can't say for certain that all this is true.

    Therefore, there isn't really much you can do.

    If you were to contact the police about the matter, they would struggle to be able to help unless you had a name, telephone number or address, for them to work with. They would likely refer her to some kind of social services (I'm not sure what it's called in other countries, in the UK it's called social services).

    And, if she doesn't want this to happen - for authorities to interfere, you don't have the right to make that decision for her when you're only an online friend.

    Instead, focus on talking to her and being a friend for her. Listen, and then ask if she wants your advice about the situation. If she says yes, advise her to talk to someone who can help: a trusted adult.

    That's all you can really do in this position.

    It sucks, but she's got to make the decision to go to the police/seek help. All you can do is offer advice and support.

    Good luck.

    • Thank you for the 'best answer', I hope her situation improves.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    She's lying to you. She is trying to get you to send her money or take her in. One of the oldest scams in the book. Be smart and delete her.

  • 1 month ago

    Here is the thing my young friend. You met her on a dating app, so I assume you have never seen in her in real life? How do you know this is even true? She could be making the whole thing up, either as a prank because she is bored or because she is mad at her parents for something. She could also be making it up so you give her more attention and care. If you knew her in real life, that'd be one thing. But you don't. If what she is saying is true, then she needs to go to the police or tell a trusted official at school.

  • 1 month ago

    i would just tell the police about it and they can contact the police in her state and they'll deal with it

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  • 1 month ago

    I appreciate your concerns, but your friend's problem is not your problem.

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