I got a call from my daughters teacher about something my daughter said?

My daughter is 11, 6th grade elementary. I pick up my daughter and my neighbors kid after school and bring them home. At the pick up area there was a little boy picking on my neighbor saying all kinds of mean things to her and my daughter told the little boy to leave her alone or she will call one of the teachers at the pick up area. The little boy told my daughter"shut up you look like a rat that came out of the dumpster" she replied with" I wouldn't be talking cause you look like momo and freddy Krueger had a baby". The little boy went and told a teacher what my daughter said and my daughter said she was just defending herself from the insults that were made towards her. Was it wrong for my daughter to defend herself like that? The school says it was wrong but I feel like part of her did right? The school said she should've gone to a teacher instead of trying to defend another student but all she did was tell the little boy to leave her friend alone she did not insult him until he did and now he doesn't like it. What should I tell my daughter? The school wants me to tell her not to insult back?

14 Answers

  • 1 month ago
    Best Answer

    Wow some of you people must not be parents.. WAY TO GO MOM teaching her to stand up for herself and her friends!!! Don t listen to these negative comments. Public schools are **** and they don t give 2 F$#%s about your child or what they become in the future. I would talk to her and be completely honest. You are proud of her for what she did and the school feels like she was wrong but she wasn t. I m proud of your daughter! to many people let themselves get bullied and it truly does affect every aspect of your life at that age. I was bullied until I stood up for myself. Took me too many years and lots of tears before I stood up for myself.

  • 4 weeks ago

    Schools have to adhere to specifics standards regarding issues such as bullying.

    Standing up for her friends is admirable but the next step should have been telling a teacher what he said to the child at the bus stop.

    You should be proud of your daughter for standing up for her friends but next time, tell her to ignore his annoying comments (directed at her) by saying that she is not interested in what he has to say (if it's something to intentionally hurt her feelings). We can't change or control someone else or the way they treat others but we can change the way we react to a bully.

    We have counselors available 24/7 to help parent and children with difficult situations they are trying to manage.

    Take care,

    SM, Counselor

    Boys Town National Hotline


    What's your source?



  • 1 month ago

    How to Decode What Teachers Say About Your Child. By .and felt like the comments meant something more than what the teacher actually said? Your child needs to be “redirected” a lot, which can get in the way of learning for all .Is it possible to not call on my child to read out loud unless you see a raised hand?

  • 1 month ago

    It's understandable how you feel because your daughter was looking out for someone else well being without becoming violent but because there is always the risk of violence unfortunately taking place I too understand why the teacher responded as she did like the saying goes two wrongs don't make a right it's not wrong for anyone to defend their selves if applicable but the school thinking of safety first and keeping peace even if students not thinking like this just inform your daughter if possible inform a trusted adult or teacher principal and hopefully her parents of issues with boy pray for a calm heart and as far as it depends on you be peaceable .

    • Carmen1 month agoReport

      Please don’t take my message in wrong matter mom I understand how you feel I’m a mom the statement wasn’t knocking your feelings it was just stating how the school system feels or does things to try to prevent violent and keep a safe environment for children it’s other people who makes problems

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  • B
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    discuss with the principal immediately

  • 1 month ago

    your daughter stood up for herself n for her friend by using her Words*..not physically*....I would definately speak with your daughter and let her know you're Proud she stood up for herself n her friend who was being bullied....but to TRY to Walk away without saying anything can also be a solultion*..then the boy is left there fighting with himself as you've removed yourself from the incident*....That was WRONG of the school to tell you what to do n if she would have went to a teacher then she's in another catagory of being a Snitch which isn't where u want her to be. She used her words n didn't get physical.....her words were not like swear words or anything, or racist words...she just replied back what he LOOKS like...but no matter what, the boy didn't get in trouble at all, n that is the part that NEEDS to change with the school board¬ Perhaps call the school board in ur district n speak with a supervisor about this* as im sure they've had to deal with this boy many times in the past as well as his parents*.....but why YOUR child n YOU get scolded n parenting lessons on how to raise Your child...that's just ludacris¬! Keep communication open with ur daughter n at least she knows you're not disappointed with her actions of using her words, and trust me, she couldve said alot more that some of these 10/11yr olds come out with that can be very hurtful words*/stabbing words actually* but to say he looks like freddy krugers baby LOL .........nothing for her to get in trouble over or being grounded for ................(gives my head a shake at some of the schools these days) ughh*

  • Byrd
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Troll alert.........

  • 2 months ago

    Insulting back is stupid and childish. Fun, maybe, but an endless opportunity of rude. And proves, promotes or solves nothing. Plus, that's a pretty complex insult your daughter came up with at the drop of a hat. Interesting. Have you never heard the phrase, taught to most kids by 6, "sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me"? Better to ask the boy how he's managed to study the appearance and habits of rats to turn the conversation.

    • history
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      I don't want the girl punished for the boy's actions. Which is what sat at the center of this question.
      Yep. I was bullied too.

  • 2 months ago

    Your daughter wasn't wrong, I would hope that my daughter would be able to defend herself like that in that situation. What action did the school take against the boy? Probably nothing. Teach your kids to defend themselves and speak up when they see injustice. It's administrators like that who support bullies by crucifying those who dare to speak up. Maybe talk to her and explain that you are proud of her for sticking up for her friend and that she did a good thing. Focus on the good, praise her for doing what most grown ups wouldn't these days.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Do what the school asks. Its simple

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