My boyfriend threatens suicide when I try to leave?
God I am so torn. I am so trapped. Yesterday i called it quits with my boyfriend, i am 18 he is 22. I then got texts saying "if you leave me i will kill myself" "i can t live without you" "i cant do this without you" I had to call an officer to do a wellness check and he was at work. Last night i tried sleeping and he called me bawling saying if I dont come pick him up and stay the night with him he will walk to a bridge that is near his house and jump. So i stayed. He had sex with me and said "i wish we had this more" and i wanted to cry. I dont want to be with anymore. I feel so trapped. He is so controlling and i dont want to live my life like this but I don t want him to kill himself i am so afraid. Please help me.
- PatriciaLv 73 months agoFavorite Answer
He needs professional help and you're not it. And it's not your fault that he's so depressed that his life feels hopeless. It feels hopeless whether you're with him or not, because someone who is threatening suicide has had mental health issues for YEARS! This isn't something that developed in a week or a few months. It's been going on for a long time.
Maybe you could consider contacting his family and letting them know about his threats.
Whatever he does, it's HIS CHOICE. Not your fault and you didn't do anything to the guy. He just has severe emotional problems which he's never decided to get a grip about.
It's up to HIM to change his life. You can't change his life by staying with him when you're not interested in doing it. Even if you were interested in staying with him, he's not going to change until he decides he WANTS TO FEEL BETTER and realizes you're not his life boat.
- 3 months ago
He is emotionally controlling you. And that is clearly not fair. Tell him that you will not accept this emotional abuse from him anymore, and mean it. If he states he will commit suicide if you leave him, then tell him... I wish you would not, but I can not and will not live this way any more. And you wish he would get the help he needs. But if you do commit suicide, that is totally his choice to end his life so he can not find happiness with another person. You will no longer be responsible or blackmailed for his actions or threats.
- TjLv 73 months ago
He will not kill himself. Tell him you are done with him and his threats of killing himself will not change anything. Then block him on everything. If he lives at home, you may want to speak with his parents and let them know what he is telling you.
- EvaLv 43 months ago
You've made it worse by giving in to his emotional blackmail. Now he knows you'll cave in if he whines and threatens enough. You have to cut him off cold. Block his number, don't respond to his texts, don't go see him. If you feel you must, send him one final text, say you're sorry but you need to do this for you, and give him the number for the suicide hotline.
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- choko_canyonLv 73 months ago
Call the suicide prevention hotline and speak with someone there about what's going on with your bf. He is NOT your responsibility, and he is using your fear and guilt to control you, and you apparently know that. If he's suicidal, then he is. It has nothing to do with YOU. If he really wants to kill himself, he will do it regardless of whether or not you're with him, and if he's bluffing then he won't. Either way, you're not responsible and you need to cut things off as soon as you can manage it.