How do you tell someone that they’re being too assertive?

I have this friend who has trouble saying what she wants and speaking up for herself. However, when she does speak up for herself or says what she wants, it comes out very snappy, bossy and/or rude. I don’t think she realizes her tone when she’s speaking to people, and I don’t know how to tell her. For example, we... show more I have this friend who has trouble saying what she wants and speaking up for herself. However, when she does speak up for herself or says what she wants, it comes out very snappy, bossy and/or rude. I don’t think she realizes her tone when she’s speaking to people, and I don’t know how to tell her. For example, we had a meeting and the president of our group was talking and he made a joke, then my friend said, “can we not do this right now. Let’s stick to what we need to discuss.” I understand my friend’s concern about going off topic, however, it’s ok to make a joke once in a while. The above is just one example, but I don’t know how to talk to her about this, but what I do know is that I NEED to talk to her, because I personally don’t like her tone either when she talks to me.
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