How do I fix my eating habits/what’s going wrong?

So I’m about 100 pounds overweight. It’s gross, I know. I’ve just always had a problem with food. There’s some days where I’m sure I eat over 3000 calories (which I know is bad). I know I should just eat less, but that doesn’t work for me either. I never eat the right amount. If I try to eat less, I count the... show more So I’m about 100 pounds overweight. It’s gross, I know. I’ve just always had a problem with food. There’s some days where I’m sure I eat over 3000 calories (which I know is bad). I know I should just eat less, but that doesn’t work for me either. I never eat the right amount. If I try to eat less, I count the calories. Which may seem like a good thing, but I can’t manage to eat over 400 calories when I’m tracking. I either eat way too many meals, or I eat nothing at all. I know I’m not healthy, but I don’t know how to fix myself. I just eat unconsciously, or I eat consciously but starve myself. When I count calories, it scares me to see how many I’m taking in. And it becomes this kind of game with myself, about what’s the smallest amount I can take in. Why can’t I just diet normally? Why are my eating habits always at extreme measures? Please help me understand.
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