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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 9 months ago

22 y/o female who cannot get over highschool lover. Its been 3 years now.?

hi. im 22 just finished my associates degree about to go back to school soon. life has been great.. new city new life new me.. but only thing missing is my person. so it all started when i was 15 and got my first job.. which he trained me at hes a year older than me. he was sweet and caring and amazing.. we spent all of our high school years (3) being friends with amazing benefits.. an it never bothered me. we had this amazing chemistry that just could not be denied.. we were inseparable and never labeled it but it was real and i didn't care.. until i realized it wasn't real for him and just before he graduated we ended things and he moved to another state for college. it was bad.. i was so sad and lost. he kept coming in and out of my life.. saying he missed me and even told me he loved me and believes i might be the one.. just saying all the little things i always wanted to hear. its been 3 years since i graduated and every so often like 3 months he will pop back in and be sweet then go away again. I've had boyfrirends since him.. but ive been mainly focused on my career and me.. he just is apart of me and always in my dreams and i dont know how to make it stop its been so long.. we havent even kissed or seen eachother in 3 years. how do i move on? is there any hope he could be the one and we will find our way back? the chemistry was just like fire.. like idk it was just STRONG and there.. we could feel sparks from accross the room or the hallway.. anytime

Update:

also. why does he do this? do you think he feels the same why and thats why he keeps coming in and out of my life? is he just to scared of the commitment? i mean he always has been alittle scared bc his parents screwed up so early and fast. does he think of me and dream of me as much as i do? am i just crazy and obsessed?

Update 2:

also pt.2 i have tried SO hard to move on but nothing works.. i even told him if he cared about me he needs to let me move on but he keeps texting/calling/snapchatting/messaging everywhere and anywhere on my phone like every 3 months then just blocks me within at most 2 days.. like idk

4 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    9 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    He DOES NOT feel the same way for you. He is the kind of man that is going to have two or three girls at a time and when he finally does get married - he is likely to have at least one "mistress" on the side. He can't commit to one person. He strings you along because he knows how you feel for him which makes you an easy sucker to be one of his "side pieces" for when he can't be with the girls he really wants to be with. The sooner you accept that he is actually a player, the sooner you might feel ready to move on.

    Change your phone number. Get a new email address. Any method that he has used to contact you - change it. Cut off all communication. Ghost him completely and then forget about him because HE DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOU.

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  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    You graduate high school you support kids getting bullied and have to deal with anxiety, I'm a HS dropout he probably got over you so ha :)

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  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    There's a guy who I had a short fling with, and at the time I was super into him but not enough to actually think about him too much when we were apart. He left the country and still messaged me every few months and he still remembers all our times together, which I find weird because it's been years now. He thinks we're soulmates or something, and whilst I did like him at the time, I only liked him enough for a fling. I'll admit there were times where I'd feel bored or lonely, so I'd message him because I knew he'd always be very happy to hear from me (I was always accepted by him, and I felt loved from him) but I'll be honest I was kinda using him in a sense. This ended up making me feel bad so I really cut things off, so that he could heal.

    I think the same thing might be happening to you. I think he likes you, but only enough for a fling. Anything more I think he's using you when he's lonely. Sorry.

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  • LP7
    Lv 7
    9 months ago

    Running hot and cold he has you on a leash.Not healthy such indecisiveness.He may have another girlfriend and you when he wants.Make a decision to place yourself first and focus on your career.There are other males you will meet who treat you with respect and care.Life's experience, nothing stays the same.

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