I met my first love and we still love each other. He's unhappily married and I'm divorced. He has one adult child. Should we pursue it?

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  • 6 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    Yes, but only on these conditions: first, he needs to resolve his unhappy marriage. Only when and IF he separates, divorces, THEN you will both be free to do as you choose. Otherwise, chances are he may remain "unhappily" married, with you as a side dish on his buffet. Good luck,

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    • Sista, Sista6 months agoReport

      Thanks again. I will definitely wait and see, while I also continue my independent life. I think that you're right. The test of his sincerity is if he makes space for us. I told him that I have no intention of starting an affair with him.

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  • Kim R
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    You may pursue it AFTER he is OFFICIALLY divorced and shows you the proof of it. Until that happens, you go do your own thing and don't hold your breath. This way you will find out his true intentions and if he is worthy or not. Don't spend any time with him before he gets his divorce because he will do his best to get you into bed, and that's a bad road to take.

    • Sista, Sista6 months agoReport

      I can decide not to have sex, regardless of what he wants. I've done that enough times, in love or not. The last time a married man was in love with me I blew him off. Now he's divorced and with someone else. I don't want to make that mistake with this guy who I really love.

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  • Layne
    Lv 5
    6 months ago

    He may do that again and a ready-made family. There are so many moving parts and it will only get worse. Run away.

    • Sista, Sista6 months agoReport

      What do you mean by ready-made family?

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  • 6 months ago

    This sounds far more complicated than a yes/no answer without enough information to do anything else.

    • Sista, Sista6 months agoReport

      We were in love 30 years ago. We still love each other. I will wait for him to divorce.

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  • KTJoe
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    Ms.lonely don't purse it ask yourself why didn't we get married why did we break up. The other thing Mr.cheater is married. Y'all ain't in love just crazy people pretending.

    • Sista, Sista6 months agoReport

      We broke up because I moved away to another country. I was young and my parents insisted that I finish my degree and I listened. We have definitely always loved each other deeply. I never fell in love like that again. He was finishing law school We had something special, but I listed to my parents.

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  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    I'd pursue "it" the very second he filed for divorce.

  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    No, you should not pursue him. Men like this think only of themselves. My husband had an affair with his first love when we'd been married for 40 years. I left him and set up a new home on my own. I hear from neighbours that she still turns up at the house now and again even though my husband is now having a second adulterous relationship. I guess neither of them know about the other one. I had a fortunate escape getting out when I did and all our children are very loyal to me still, seven years after I left him.

    There's no fool like an old fool and my ex is certainly A FOOL. Don't be one yourself. I feel deeply sorry for the loyal husband of that other woman. He hasn't a clue what has gone on and is still, it seems, going on.

  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    I wouldn't, not until he's divorced. "Unhappily married" is a tag guys willing to cheat on their wives use, but whether it's true is in doubt, and even if it is, they're still married men. If he loves you like he says he does, he needs to be free of his marriage before you see what happens when you're together.

    • Sista, Sista6 months agoReport

      He has never spoken to me about his wife in detail or claimed that he is unhappily married. I just think he is, because he is often alone in another country from her calling me and imaging us doing all sorts of fun things together and wanting to plan all sorts of things with me....

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  • 6 months ago

    I agree that we should not get intimate as in having sex while he's married but what about friendship until he's made a space for us in his life or should I cut off all contact considering our love for each other?

    • Barb Outhere
      Lv 7
      6 months agoReport

      Is that going to be enough for you? Is that really what HE wants from you? Taking the risk of starting something that shouldn't have started int he first place.

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  • 6 months ago

    If thatsvwhat you both want then why you talking to us? Go get yourself your new man.

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  • Enigma
    Lv 6
    6 months ago

    Not while he is still married.

    • Sista, Sista6 months agoReport

      I agree, but we can talk and see each other as long as we keep it clean, right?

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