I'm in a 10 year abusive marriage and have an online 1 month relationship, what should I do?

I tell the online man when my husband rapes me, as per his wishes, but he responds by saying I enjoyed it or he's glad I'm having a nice day. I feel so angry and blame myself for staying. And I hate that he doesn't believe me. I started drinking recently to cope with everything and I'm seeing a... show more I tell the online man when my husband rapes me, as per his wishes, but he responds by saying I enjoyed it or he's glad I'm having a nice day. I feel so angry and blame myself for staying. And I hate that he doesn't believe me. I started drinking recently to cope with everything and I'm seeing a psychiatrist this week (husband's wishes). I feel so messed up and need advice. I'm no longer functioning.
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