This guy is confusing me?

Long story short, I talked to this guy over the summer (he’s 18 I’m 17). We weren’t officially dating but we were acting like a couple. I thought everything was fine but apparently it wasn’t since he dropped me off through the phone during vacation the day he was supposed to be back. A couple days later met up with him to talked about it and he basically said that he kinda had this expectation the beginning and it felt like it didn’t meet the expectations. He also said that it looked like I’m just doing this for him and not for myself which is totally wrong. I just don’t do relationship Bc I’ve never been in one and I’m scared but I was willing to try Bc I liked him and if he felt the same way I would be willing to try. We ended up going back as friends but it felt more like acquaintance. We rarely talked to each other and when we pass the hallway, he would just act like he doesn’t know me. About 3 weeks after he dropped me, he ended up texting one of my guy friend about this and ended saying how he was “sad and depressed” Bc he f@cked up real bad for dropping a girl Bc she didn’t do relationship and how he felt that the chemistry wasn’t there and how he didn’t feel as happy as he thought. My guy friend told me that and it jut made me so confused about what he wants. I told my guy friend everything and I ended up crying and I was so mad at myself for crying over a stupid boy because I told myself to never cry over a boy. What should I do? He just made me more confused now.

1 Answer

  • 6 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    Don't be confused and don't think it's your fault. He wasn't into a relationship as such - so you have had a lucky escape really. 18 year old guys are usually after sex primarily and if it doesn't appear on the menu quickly enough, they make their escape in the hopes they'll find it somewhere else. His idea of relationship was sex - your idea of relationship was closeness, kindness and possibly eventually some sex too - but not primarily. Males/females are wired differently. You stick to your own personal rules and you will (after tentatively sampling a few more guys) find one that suits you perfectly. You'd have done better blubbing to another girl than a guy-friend because although he probably did his best for you, he wouldn't have totally understood what you were on about either, being a man. Also, I would suggest that in future broken relationships (there will be more I'm sure) you dispense with the 'let's just be friends' rubbish. It doesn't work and just complicates the issue. It's obviously done so for him because it sounds like he's confused too. However, that's NOT your problem. Don't feel too sorry for him. He dumped you, so leave him to stew in his own juice. There are plenty more fish in the sea. The main thing is NOT to feel that it's something you did or didn't do. He just wasn't the right person for you at this particular time. You probably need someone a little more mature.

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