How do I stop helping people when it harms my life?
Most of my friends, family, and classmates expect me to help them no matter what. I have been spending hours a day helping one of my friends with homework and hardly getting any sleep because I’m up past 4 am helping her and get up at 5:30. I have my own work to do and can’t do it all when everyone needs my constant help.
I’ve had hardly any time to myself and know have to learn almost a year’s worth of physics in 2 days. I want to tell people that I’m busy and have to do my work but then they’ll get mad at me and I won’t have any friends (I know they’re not real friends if they just take advantage of me but it’s better than being alone).
How can I focus on myself without making everyone hate me?
- CogitoLv 75 months agoFavorite Answer
There are better ways of letting people know that you can't help them.
Try saying, the next time someone asks for help, that you're so tired you can't think, so this time they're on their own. Or say that you don't feel well. But don't let them persuade you to help!
You're right, in that if they really are your friends, they'll be happy to accept that.
And, if they do get mad, you just have to be brave and accept that they were only taking advantage of you. They aren't going to hate you - just start taking responsibility for their own lives.
In most ways, you'd actually be doing them a huge favour by NOT helping them. They aren't going to be able to rely on you in the future and they're never going to be able do their own work if you keep doing it for them!
Having false friends is NOT better than being alone.
- Alan HLv 75 months ago
You are not a puppet. Just be honest
Help is important....but they know you cannot be everywhere
- 5 months ago
If you can't force yourself to say NO then get them to stop asking. When they ask you to do something say yes and smile. Then whatever you are doing for them just flock it up as bad as you can. Soon they will stop asking.
And look on the bright. If they won't talk to you when you don't help them you can get some sleep.
- 5 months ago
Kill the criminals save the innocents