Stepson moves in and is stressing me out!?

What would you do if your 18 year old stepson who you love dearly is a couch potato, eats every 2 hours, not thinking about others eating and only washes his dishes he used in the sink when that is one of his chores to do...I am getting frustrated and don't want to explode on him or my partner...what would you guys seriously do.

11 Answers

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    4 months ago

    I'd speak to my partner in calm and measured tones and suggest that you hate watching this young adult waste his life in this manner. This kid's guidance is his bio parent's problem and it'll probably take that bio parent laying down some house rules to get him to change. Someone this age needs to be in school and in work, not at home all day acting like a 15 year-old.

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    4 months ago

    maybe you should kick him out if he dont want to do anything

  • 4 months ago

    You don't need to explode. You need to set some rules. He needs to act like a member of the family. Parents who have not had full custody of their children often act like your partner- they are afraid of laying down the law to their kids for fear they'll move out and the parent won't see them anymore. But this is your house. And teaching him how to live with others will be good practice for him when he gets married.

  • Anonymous
    4 months ago

    I think you should cut him a little bit of slack. He is washing his own dishes, so that's good. Where I live I wash my own dishes as well.

    I live with four men, so I really don't want to be spending my time washing their dishes. I have other things to do with my time.

    I think everything else you said is a problem.

    I graduated from college when I was 21 years old, so if your step son continues living like that at age 21 then I think you should kick him out. You could kick him out right now, but I think his chances of survival won't be good.

    Lastly finishing school isn't all that's happened in my life.

    Source(s): I am a male.
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  • 4 months ago

    u should buy a DISHWASHER. how poor loser are u who does not have a dishwasher in your household

    • FizzledPop4 months agoReport

      If you can't comment like a mature adult, don't bother to put in your immature 2 cents, you are very ignorant and need to grow up...God bless!

  • GA41
    Lv 7
    4 months ago

    I would try not to lose my temper. Consequences determine behavior. I would Identify the specific behaviors I want to encourage and those specific behaviors I want to discourage. I would try to reward his good behaviors, and I would try very hard not to reward his bad behaviors. I would put more emphasis on rewarding his good behaviors.

    I would do the same with his parent. I would try very hard not to be an enabler.

  • M
    Lv 6
    4 months ago

    I get it. My choice is to find a way to live my life without that influence. I live in the upstairs made it a small apartment like. I'm independent to some degree. Let the dishes pile I don't care because I don't see it.

  • 4 months ago

    Before we invite someone to live with us, we have a conversation with them about our house rules and what we expect from them. Then, before they move in, they need to agree to our terms.

    But apparently, you and your husband didn't have this conversation with the kid? I'm not sure, you didn't say.

    But why would you explode on your partner? Tell the kid you'd like to ask him to start cleaning up after himself and taking care of his household responsibilities starting immediately. I would, and i have with step kids and with my own. it doesn't kill them to help out.

  • Bleu
    Lv 7
    4 months ago

    Well I'd address your concerns to your partner, and you guys both decide how you're going to tell your stepson to get his act together. If you ask me, it's better to not beat around the bush.

  • Henry
    Lv 5
    4 months ago

    If it says moves in, then he isn't 18 years old, as that would be as soon as he could be an adult and not long after he can start driving.

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