Revenge feminization?

I have been cheating on my girlfriend for over a year and am really good at hiding it. But a couple of weeks ago she called me to tell me she was getting off work early. I had a girl at our apartment, so we had to rush her out before my gf got home. Turns out that she left some things at the apartment - including... show more I have been cheating on my girlfriend for over a year and am really good at hiding it. But a couple of weeks ago she called me to tell me she was getting off work early. I had a girl at our apartment, so we had to rush her out before my gf got home. Turns out that she left some things at the apartment - including some makeup and her stockings.

I completely panicked and told her that they were mine and that I was crossdressing. I've never ever been into crossdressing and have never worn a piece of woman's clothing a day in my life, but she totally believed me.

She was cool about it, almost too happy. She told me she felt like it brought us closer together, whatever that means. So here's my problem: she's been buying me more women's clothing and makeup and expecting me to wear them around the apartment for the past two weeks. I've felt so guilty that I've agreed to do it and acted as though I liked it. Yesterday I told her I didn't want to do it anymore, but she got upset and told me that she didn't want me to keep stuff from her. I don't even know what that means!

Please, someone tell me what I can do to get over this situation. Coming clean is not an option - she will definitely dump me and I can't let that happen. So no, I won't tell her no matter what. I'm not going to cheat on her anymore and I guess I'm ok with her thinking I crossdress (eww), but I can't stand dressing up like this anymore. I feel like my masculinity is fading away :(
Update: Maddie, No I do not deserve what happens to me I just need advice because I feel like I'm becoming more and more of a woman
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