Should I put a stop to it before it happens?
My 13 year old son and I've lived with my boyfriend for 10 years. My boyfriend has a niece who is 2 years older than my son. I would say they grow up together because we do things together all the times. The way I see it is they are cousins. Lately, I noticed they are really good friends. They talk on the phone all the times. When we came back from a vacation, meaning they haven't seen each other for 10 days, they instantly hugged the longest I've even seen. I see that's really some good cousinly friendship. But my boyfriend said he didn't mind "something" grow in them. Hm... I don't know what to think. Technically it maybe OK since my boyfriend and I are not married so they are not real cousins. But they also grow up like cousins. How is it like socially? Would friends and family feel weird about it? Should I put a stop to it when I see chance?
- 11 months agoFavorite Answer
Some of the answers were so quick to judge. We don't know why she wasn't married to the boyfriend. There is always reasons, but it is not the question here. The question is about the youngsters growing up around them. Since the niece didn't go on vocation with them, I assume they don't live together, so they grow up like cousins, maybe close cousins. From the sound of it, they love each other really a friendly way. I think the boyfriend is kind of irresponsible to even suggest it. Since you're not married and there is no blood related, I wouldn't worry too much what direction it takes. Don't even make a fuzz and don't intervene because it would be useless if something did happen. I kind of feel nothing would happen though.
- EdnaLv 711 months ago
If you and your 13-year-old son have been living with your boyfriend for 10 years, that means your son was 3 years old when you and your boyfriend began living together.
Your son and your boyfriend's cousin are NOT "cousins". They are nothing to each other. They're not even "step" cousins, because you and your boyfriend aren't married to each other. What exactly do you want to "put a stop" to? If your son and your boyfriend's cousin decide they want to get together, they're not breaking any laws. They're not related to one another - either by blood or by marriage.
- chris nLv 711 months ago
They are NOT like cousins. They are more like brother and sister for 10 years since they were 3 and 5 years old. They love each other as such. I wouldn't worry too much about it. Luckily for you and your b/f, they aren't genetically related so if 'anything' happened it wouldn't be incest in that way - although it probably would emotionally. I wouldn't put it into their heads. They've lived closely for 10 years since they were babies. Don't worry about it. You and your b/f are talking 'adult'. They are just teenagers. Let them get on with their lives and don't interfere.
- PatriciaLv 711 months ago
They aren't related so i don't see how it would matter if they were interested in each other romantically. For all you know, they may have had sex already (if any of this is remotely true).
What do you care what friends and family think? It would be absolutely none of their business.
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- 11 months ago
Leave then alone. If they ain't doing anything they aren't supposed to be doing why do you need to interfere with it. Can you prove they are having sex with each other? Why is okay for you and your boy friend to be intimate when you aren't married?
- Alan HLv 711 months ago
You have given an example of sex and physical contact without marriage.
Why should you be surprised if they imitate?
It is likely to fade out at the age they are
- pit bulls biteLv 711 months ago
i would have no problem with them having sex
- STEPHENLv 711 months ago
They're not cousins. There is no blood link. You've been with your bf for 10 years without taking it any further so why does his neice and your son bother you?
- 11 months ago
Lol I'm sorry this is just a really awkward funny situation your in. I was gonna say one thing then another but to be honest if they really like each other then there's nothing you can do about it, if you step in then your friends and family would know what you did which could create tension or gossip and if you don't it will anyway lol I'm sorry.
- David B.Lv 711 months ago
Let me make sure I understand. You have been living with a guy for ten years and yet there is no meaningful commitment between the two of you but you think you have the power to stop a romantic relationship between two teens? You consider them cousins when they aren't? You are delusional in my opinion.