Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 7 months ago

Can sexless marriages really be fixed?

My wife is a terrible prude and I've been without sex for years. I've stayed for the kids but don't know how much longer I can hold out as I have wants and needs. Is change possible? She has become really involved in church and views everything as dirty. Even if I snuggle up and touch her she rejects me and stays on Facebook. I'm not fat or out of shape. I'm not lazy and work hard for her and the kids. All she does is stay on her phone. Always on her phone. I try setting up date nights but it's always an excuse.

78 Answers

Relevance
  • Anonymous
    7 months ago

    Yes it can be fixed with sex,just not with her she wants that life,you don’t do leave, if there’s one thing I’ve learnt in life it’s to not stay where your not happy, you don’t need to be together to be good parents, leave her and find what you desire you don’t live by her conditions it’s b/s up and leave

    • Login to reply the answers
  • 7 months ago

    They can be fixed if both people are willing to work and be patient with each other. Now, in my humble opinion, if you've talked to your partner/tried to get help for your partner and work things out and he/she is just unwilling, it's time to go! Before I got married, my sex life was great and then when she got the ring, it's like she forgot all about her duties so she's gone. I didn't put up with it for long and you shouldn't either.

    • Login to reply the answers
  • 7 months ago

    Have her read Song of Solomon - a very sexy book. Includes oral sex, etc.

    • Login to reply the answers
  • 7 months ago

    Your not the only one mine just decided half way through life she changed her mind and thats cool because thats what she wants and I'm just a lost soul that should agree with her and go without and there should be no argument because you should agree because your suppose to be thankful for her making that the law I say BS what kind of brainwashing are you living and where did you ever think that was ok? Just because your selfish and controling I'm supposed to just say ok? Look religion is cool and if she thinks its dirty remember this the bible is not a religious book its a family tree its all about family it tells you wich family you are from how do you make a family without sex and the only dirty thing about it is not showring first there are no rules saying it cant be fun God said remain child like to keep the adventure real not childish now last one in bed is a rotten egg!

    • Login to reply the answers
  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 7 months ago

    Sounds like yall need marriage counseling.. try go on a date.. have u talled to her about this?

    • Login to reply the answers
  • Anonymous
    7 months ago

    Sounds like counseling would be a good idea and please get her some help.

    Use the Bible as an aid and tell her this:

    1 Corinthians 7:1-12 New International Version (NIV)

    Concerning Married Life

    7 Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. 3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6 I say this as a concession, not as a command. 7 I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.

    Notice this exert from the scriptures says not to deprive each other and a wise mate will meet needs of their partner even if they are not in the mood.

    This is a scripture you can share with her to show she is supposed to have these intimacies in marriage and get her some help to find out why she feels the way she does and save the marriage because kids do better with two loving parents.

    • Illuminosity
      Lv 4
      7 months agoReport

      It will not change. I was married for twenty two years to a man who rarely wanted sex; nor was affectionate in any way, and believe me, I kept myself in shape and was a model, so it wasn't due to me. Cold people are void of love; how she can call herself a "Christian, " is beyond me.

    • Login to reply the answers
  • Tara
    Lv 7
    7 months ago

    They can be fixed but it takes " 2 " willing partners (not just 1 one).

    Tell her the brutal truth on how you feel (but do it kindly).

    Also - the Bible tells the wife about her husband .. does she know this ?

    • Login to reply the answers
  • 7 months ago

    Well how have you changed? Maybe the problem is you and she is reacting to that. Marriage is a LOT more than sex.

  • Anonymous
    7 months ago

    no it cannot be fixed ....

    • Login to reply the answers
  • 7 months ago

    This hasn't always been the way if you have children. However, you do rather need to explore just why it is that she no longer wishes to make love with you. DOES she love you? Enough to make some effort and some necessary sacrifices and compromises? What does she actually want from your marriage? How does she see the future? Reading books like Dr Phil McGraw's excellent Relationship Rescue helps to give us deeper insights into how relationships work. (I wish I got commission, as I recommend it to so many people!). As he writes in the book, it isn't only or people whose relationships are in trouble. There are other excellent books, of course.

    • Login to reply the answers
Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.