Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 6 months ago

Am I right to use my kids in this situation?

My cousin left his wife last year for another woman. His wife and he were happy until this woman came into the picture and my cousin was week and committed adultery. Instead of owning up to it he has left his wife and they have 3 kids, one of whom is developmentally disabled.

So my brother offered to take my kids with his son over to see our cousin who had his kids for the weekend and his lover (they live together now) and the kids could play. I said no. I did not want my cousin seeing all the kids and thinking everyone is fine or my kids having fun with someone like my cousin. They see my cousin's kids when they are with their mother I have remained close with.

Was I using my kids to get revenge or is this a valid reaction to someone as immoral as my cousin and his lover are being? I feel it is valid but my brother seemed to think I was punishing the kids to get the cousin back for his horrible action.

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  • 6 months ago
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    You can have a talk with your kids and let them understand the situation with your cousin, but don't punish the kids for something your cousin did. You can flat out tell your cousin you don't approve, but if your kids and his are used to seeing each other, that shouldn't stop. It's not his kids fault. What you absolutely CAN do is refuse to allow them to be at your cousins house with his new girl toy around. Invite his kids to YOUR house or bring your kids to your brothers when your cousins kids are there. Or if she's not going to be home, like.. at all.. then they can go to the cousins. Thats just what I would do.

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