Experiencing bad homesickness and can t go home for a month. What do I do?
I m 14 and am currently on vacation in Porto for 1 month and 11 days with my grandparents on my dad s side. I ve been here for less than a week and I ve started to have really bad homesickness. I call my mother and brother back home but I feel worse after the call ends. I came here to Porto with my grandparents so that I could see all my family here again and so I can have a break from my brother s tantrums, however, since I speak very little Portuguese, it s hard to communicate with my family here. Most of my days here have been spent by seeing family and feeling like an outcast because I don t understand what everyone is saying when my grandma speaks with the family for hours. I thought that I would enjoy my vacation because when I had first come to Porto 7 years ago, I enjoyed it very much. I really don t know what to do here or how to make myself feel happier during my vacation. I don t want to tell my grandparents how I m feeling because they were really happy for me to be here and think that I m very happy to be here too, so I don t want to make them sad. Any advice would be very appreciated
- ZLv 57 months ago
It seems that you are an unhappy person and you carry your misery everywhere you go. When you were at home you were not happy (and you conveniently blamed it on your brother's tantrums), now you are away and you are still not happy (and are blaming it on language barriers). You are the kind of person who could be put in God's Paradise and still find a reason to be unhappy. Trust me, the reason for your unhappiness has nothing to do with the language or the people. Many people go on vacation where they do not know anyone and cannot speak the local language but they enjoy themselves and have lots of fun. And I really don't see how your brother's tantrums are such a big problem for you that it could make you want to escape the country. You're not exactly your brother's caretaker, so let those saddled with the responsibility of taking care of him be the ones to complain about his tantrums. What you need to do is look deep inside and discover the real reasons for your unhappiness. Maybe what you need is love, a cute boyfriend/girlfriend who chats with you all the time, a sweet and joyous romantic relationship with someone who adores you, and then all the problems around you will cease to have any effect on you. Whatever the real cause of your unhappiness is, you need to discover it and address it, because going back home will not take your sadness and loneliness away.
- PearlLv 77 months ago
rnaybe you should find sorneone to interpret so you could have rnore fun with thern here
- Anonymous7 months ago
Ask your mother if you can come home now and if she agrees, just tell your grandparents that you are sorry but that you are homesick and miss your mother and friends.
- CLv 77 months ago
I used to get shipped off to relatives in the summer. The homesickness gets worse before it gets better, that's just how it works. A few suggestions from experience, but don't feel like you have to follow them. Don't speak to your family back home every day. That will make you feel worse because it prevents you becoming fully present where you actually are. It's okay to tell your mom that you feel lonely and miss her more just after the call/facetime/etc ends so you'd like to call one a week at a set time and make a fuss about those calls so that they're a bit of an occasion. Ask to help out with stuff. You learn a language best through doing things and you will get to know your grandparents better. Go hang out with your cousins (if you have any) and be all ears. It's easier to learn to listen than to speak, but the more you listen the easier speaking gets. Take breaks where you're not always "on" because it's exhausting trying to be fully immersed. Read, watch a movie in English, write a paper letter to a friend back home, take a nap. Your brain has been working overtime to decode everything and it is exhausting. Confide in your grandparents that you're feeling homesick and that it's hard keeping up with everyone all the time even though you love seeing everyone again. I bet that they'll be more sympathetic than you think.
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- ?Lv 77 months ago
Here are some suggestions:
Start a journal. Write down your experiences daily for review when you return home. You'd be surprised to read the treasures you wrote! In fact, you should start this journal in addition to doing something else.
Find yourself a good book to read. If there aren't any at home, find a library. If there isn't a library close by, ask someone to bring you to a bookstore.
Take the opportunity to LEARN Portuguese. What a great opportunity you have!
Go sightseeing. You obviously have access to the internet since you were able to post this question. Search for tourist places nearby that you could go see. Ask someone to bring you there. These outings could be fun for you as well as your relatives.
Go for walks with your grandparents.
MAKE AN EFFORT to communicate and LEARN some Portuguese. You have this amazing opportunity to get to know your relatives, and you are blowing it by feeling sorry for yourself.
Good luck & best wishes!