Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Education & ReferenceHigher Education (University +) · 6 months ago

I have failed so much at the age of 20. I need some life advice. Input in comments please and read the details.?

Turning 21 in August, Im a Civil Engineering student in the UK. I’ve hit a real slump in terms of my education. I’ve always been an ambitious person. Socially very outgoing, participating in activities and clubs captain of the football team & Im currently working on opening a resale clothing business on Instagram. But I just cant get my education right, I retook a year in middle-school. Came to University barley past my foundation year, then failed & retook my first year & then failed my retake. Im currently withdrawn from my uni so I don’t have an education. If i go to another uni in the UK, I would start from the first year for the third time and obviously go to a new uni with no one I know and graduating when Im 24. All my friends are graduating this year and next year. I feel as though I am so far behind them in education and retaking will leave me out even further. I haven’t ever felt this down about something. I have seriously thought about dropping out but I don’t know what I would do where I would work without a degree, and if my goals would be achievable.

My biggest fear is that I would never achieve the goals that I dream about and obsess about daily. My family’s pressuring me in so many different places, they talk about “you need a degree” “without a degree you cant do anything in life” “you will always be lower than anyone else” “ you cant get a job with out it”.

I just don’t know what I should do, Im very stuck and I would really like to see your opinions.

7 Answers

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  • 6 months ago

    I agree with someone below. It sounds like you are not meant to be an engineer. You are not a failure engineering is extremely difficult of course you are going to fail most people do. Go back and major in something else.

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  • 6 months ago

    take your time to finish. People do things at different paces. Or if you really hate it, drop out and do things you love. Life is short

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  • cool
    Lv 6
    6 months ago

    Sorry to hear about your circumstances.

    It might surprise you to hear this, but you will probably find an apprenticeship more stimulating than your university degree.

    Engineering students have practically zero training on computer assisted modelling on finite element analysis.

    There are plenty of engineering apprenticeships available, but you might find it preferable to put engineering on hold (for now) and focus on your clothing business.

    Do you have any interest in learning computer assisted drawing?

    The job linked below pays 40,000 a year and has no degree requirement. It's a great way to get into engineering...

    I sincerely wish you all the best.

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  • 6 months ago

    *holds up paper and squints*

    Where's the University of Barley? Is that Nebraska or something? ;-)

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  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    You can't get a job without a degree? That's not true in the UK. People with degrees are stacking shelves. A degree is worthless in the UK without experience. Go back to the us. Life is tough here

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  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    It doesn’t sound like you should be a civil engineer. I think you need to see a career professional and figure out what you actually like and are good at.

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  • 6 months ago

    It sounds to me that you're depressed, which would explain your ambivalence and indecision and loss of ambition. The first thing you should do is stop comparing yourself to your peers. It doesn't matter if you graduate later than they do - it's not a reflection of your self worth in any way.

    Civil engineering is so different from retailing clothing on Instagram, I don't know what to say about that. Business and marketing are very different skills from those needed for civil engineering.

    Here in the US, the Dept. of Labor publishes a career guide every 5 years. It lists every type of legal job in the country, the average salary, the educational requirements, and forecasts for growth over the next 5 years. The UK might publish something similar. Also, here we can take state sponsored vocational evaluation tests. These help narrow down skills. It's due to this type of test that I found out I have attention deficit disorder, a revelation that made a lot of sense to me. It's why I got so lost in factories and noisy work environments.

    Very few of us wind up with a job that makes us happy. People who do manage that are extremely fortunate. Most of us do well if we can find something meaningful that pays well.

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