Why do I fear physical intimacy?

I can’t figure out why I’m like this. I fear it so much. I’ve been trying to think if there’s something that happened in my childhood to make me like this but I honestly don’t know. There have only been maybe two things that I would guess are culprits. When I was 8, my friend’s brother and his friend pushed me onto... show more I can’t figure out why I’m like this. I fear it so much. I’ve been trying to think if there’s something that happened in my childhood to make me like this but I honestly don’t know. There have only been maybe two things that I would guess are culprits. When I was 8, my friend’s brother and his friend pushed me onto the bed and started unbuttoning my shirt. It didn’t seem like that big of a deal in the moment though. The other thing is that I liked a guy for four years and then I found out he sexually assaulted another girl. Could these be why I’m like this? Or is it just random and for no reason?
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