Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingAdolescent · 6 months ago

I feel stuck in life already at such a young age?

This might come off as "rant-y", but I just need some advice because I truly feel like I'm wasting my youth and don't know how to realistically move forward in life.

I graduated high school in 2017 and I just turned 21 not long ago. I have a little less than a year of college credits done (I did a full year, but some of the credits got messed up). College was really good most of spring semester, but I had to leave because it was just too expensive for my family and there was extremely little financial aid.

I planned to transfer to a state university and commute from home for Fall 2019 but my other college won't release my transcripts until I pay 30k (out of pocket, since that's what my already heavy student loans didn't cover). Unsurprisingly I don't have 30k and neither does my mom. I'm not even allowed to "start over" without any credits because it's a law to have an official transcript from every college I've attended. Most of my graduating class are at least halfway done already and I'm still a freshman "on paper".

I like my job a lot, but the money isn't great and there isn't a promotion available for me right now for full time. Transferring stores also isn't an option for me either because I can't drive and no one will teach me. I even did lessons from both a driving school and just a licensed adult but both were useless and flaked on me. The instructors were even rude to me when I already felt horrible about not having a license.

I have no friends either. :(


Thanks for your answer! I'm definitely NOT an adult though! D; Just somewhere in the transitional and awkward phase.

I like the company I work in a lot, it's not that I'm looking for other employment. I'd need to transfer to get a higher position though, and eventually I'd like to go into corporate which I'd most likely need a business/marketing degree for. Also going to college is probably better for my mental health I've noticed

Update 2:

I literally said I was asking for advice on how to better my life with my current situation... but that's "whining" I guess!

The school I attended was 65k a year; it's one of the best colleges in the country for my major at the time and was very competitive to get into.

2 Answers

  • edward
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    You’re a whiner. That’s your problem. Where on earth do you go to University that it costs $30,000 a year? There is only one place in my city that charges that much and that’s only for regular school, not post secondary, college is too expensive where you live.

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  • LizB
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    Okay, all of these are problems, but they're nothing that a young, able-bodied adult willing to work hard can't overcome. Health and youth make you *highly* employable, with or without a college degree, so right now you should take advantage of that. I'll break it down:

    - Forget about college for now. You may feel like you somehow missed the boat by not graduating on time, but believe me, there are A LOT of non-traditional college students these days, and many people take longer to graduate than the traditional 4 years. In most fields of work, taking an extra couple of years to graduate won't harm you in the workplace, particularly if you were gaining work experience in the meantime.

    - Make getting your driver's license your #1 priority. It will give you SO MANY more options for work and life in general! You had bad luck with your driving school and the instructor you found, and that sucks. But try again. Being able to transport yourself wherever you need to go offers freedom and flexibility, and it would also allow you to either take a second part-time job or transfer to a store where you can get full-time hours.

    - When you get your license, also consider looking into seasonal jobs you can take outside your regular work hours. For example, Halloween stores will be opening soon, and there are always more work opportunities around the winter holidays. But you should be proactive and talk to managers before they start actively hiring for November & December, so that you have the best shot at not just getting hired, but also at getting preferential hours.

    - During this time away from school, think about whether you really *need* to finish or not. Is the degree you were pursuing actually marketable? Is it worth going into debt over (because you'd probably have to get a loan to pay that $30K to release your transcripts)? Because if it's not, maybe you shouldn't go back, at least not now. I mean, if you like your job and it has potential for advancement, why not stay there a while? If you get to a point in your career where a degree would make a difference, you could finish then. Maybe right now it's just not worth it -- or needed, really.

    - That said, contact your school's bursar's office and work out a payment plan for the $30K owed that you can afford right now. You probably can't pay much on your current salary, but the payment plan would not be so much to pay the $30K off as it would prevent the school from reporting the debt on your credit report. Employers do sometimes check employee credit reports before hiring, and a $30K default wouldn't look good. So see if you can work out a payment plan, at least until you can get your other issues sorted out and then decide if/when you'll return to school.

    - As for friends, it's just harder to make friends as an adult. But not impossible. Most of us meet people through work, interests, or mutual acquaintances. Getting your license and being able to get out on your own will open options for your social life -- so once again, make that a priority!

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