Is it okay to not invite someone’s husband/wife to your wedding? Please help, not sure what to do?

I am 35 and getting married in six months. I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years now. A family friend was married two years ago (our parents are almost kind of best friends with their parents and we siblings are close with their siblings; not best friends but close). I was invited to his wedding but he... show more I am 35 and getting married in six months. I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years now. A family friend was married two years ago (our parents are almost kind of best friends with their parents and we siblings are close with their siblings; not best friends but close).

I was invited to his wedding but he didn’t give me a +1. I intend to reciprocate by asking him but not his wife. My parents don’t think that it is right if I don’t ask her because they are married, but I think so what, he could have very well given me the option of a +1 but didn’t, I would have definitely asked her if he had. Just an issue of fairness.

My fiancé doesn’t want to ask her either, there are couple of instances of the exact same issue on her side and she doesn’t want to ask them either. This is our day after all and we almost certainly won’t invite those people but just wanted to hear other’s opinions on the matter?
Update: Also I don’t really understand why people say that married should get a +1 but not others
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