I cannot imagine how bad that must feel. Just over three years ago I found out I had a stage 4 cancer and it was unlikely I'd survive and was asked if I'd prefer palliative care rather than chemo. I chose the treatment and I'm still here. I took the news of the seriousness of my illness very calmly and just went along with what had to be done. I was fortunate to have all family members living close, all giving support, visiting me in hospital, ferrying me around in their cars for scans, preparing food for me at home in between treatments, even blending foods that I could not swallow because of the soreness in my mouth etc. Without that help I would never have survived. I would have found it harder to attend the chemo sessions. In Britain I would have been able to ask for an ambulance to collect me and return me to my home but that would have meant fitting in with their timing, not mine. Each day would have been so much longer and more stressful than it was. Stress is something we don't need when we are really ill.