What is the purpose of my life?

I am 32 years old woman from Italy. I am still living with my parents. My dreams are hard to conquer, i wish i were born in U.S.A, I wish i could live abroad. Unfortunately, I have been suffering from anxiety and depression for as long as I can remember. That means being unable to properly plan things, set valid... show more I am 32 years old woman from Italy. I am still living with my parents. My dreams are hard to conquer, i wish i were born in U.S.A, I wish i could live abroad. Unfortunately, I have been suffering from anxiety and depression for as long as I can remember. That means being unable to properly plan things, set valid goals, stay motivated and having physical energies. Yes I failed to achieve my dreams and now I live with my parents. I do not want to work where i live cause all the jobs are in the town and waking up a 6 a.m makes me heavily sick, for real. I also do not want to get married and do not want kids, I have 0 friends. I also happen to be very introvert and spending time with others it always feels like compromising and faking. I search for my purpose but it seems no were to be found, and no I do not believe in god. What should i do with my life? I know you may suggest trying new things, but i already have a few things i like, I just don't feel driven enough. If my life would end in a month i would just be relieved of all the pain i will be spared, and for sure enjoying the last days worry-free. To make things worse i also hate the part of the country in which i currently live, people are closed-minded, mainly uneducated and mediocre. I got used to be alone, and even when i do something fun and try hard to enjoy it and be grateful for it, it just Nha... I lost the spark.
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