mathew b asked in HealthMental Health · 5 months ago

Is this normal grieving?

My great grandmother and I were very close and I took care of her for about the last 6 months of her life. She passed in 2007 and it was devastating to me, but I turned my grief into my motivation to go to college and build a career working with older adults. It’s been 12 years since she passed away, but there are times when I hear a song or just think about her while I’m in my morning or afternoon commute and I’ll cry. Is this normal? Is there ever an end to grieving a difficult loss?

6 Answers

Relevance
  • 5 months ago

    Realistically, nothing will completely erase the pain you feel. If you try some of these suggestions, you may find that they will bring you a welcome measure of relief. The Awake! does not endorse any particular health treatment but here are some suggestions to help you:

    COPING WITH GRIEF

    1: ACCEPT SUPPORT FROM FAMILY AND FRIENDS

    According to your needs, balance time spent with others and time spent alone.

    2: WATCH YOUR DIET, AND MAKE TIME FOR EXERCISE

    Eat healthful food, drink plenty of water, and exercise moderately.

    3: GET PLENTY OF SLEEP

    Recognize that sleep is essential to dealing with the fatigue of grieving.

    4: BE FLEXIBLE

    Since everyone grieves differently, find what works for you.

    5: AVOID SELF-DESTRUCTIVE HABITS

    Avoid the misuse of alcohol or drugs—which creates more problems than it solves.

    6: BALANCE YOUR TIME

    Alternate periods of grieving with time for socializing and recreation.

    7: KEEP A ROUTINE

    Regain a sense of normalcy by keeping yourself occupied with a good routine.

    8: AVOID MAKING BIG DECISIONS TOO SOON

    If possible, wait a year or more before making big decisions you may later regret.

    9: REMEMBER YOUR LOVED ONE

    Collect pictures and mementos or write in a journal to keep alive your memory of the person who has died.

    10: GET AWAY

    Make time for a change of pace—even if for just a day or part of a day.

    11: HELP OTHERS

    Renew your sense of purpose by doing things for those who need help, including others affected by the loss of your loved one.

    12: REEVALUATE YOUR PRIORITIES

    Use this opportunity to gain new insights into what truly matters and, as needed, make adjustments to your priorities. www.jw.org

  • 5 months ago

    Twelve years is a very long time to continue to grieve the loss of your beloved grandmother.

    Please check with your own doctor about grief counseling.

  • Anonymous
    5 months ago

    Everyone grieves in a different way and in a different time frame.

    My husband died very young, in his early 30's, also in 2007 and there are still days when I can barely get out of bed in the morning.

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    5 months ago

    i think its norrnal

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 5 months ago

    Yes, that is very normal.

    Many people think grief is a one time event, or maybe an event that lasts a year or two, but in reality, grief is a lifetime event. The sharp pain of loss goes away over time, but missing someone who was very important to you never stops. It's especially common when you have a milestone in life, like graduating college, or starting a new job, or turning 30, or getting married - things you would have shared with her, and she's not there.

    If you find yourself crying all the time, or unable to participate in and enjoy normal activities because of your grief, that would be the time to get help, but it sounds like for now it is just missing someone you loved, and that means she was very important to you and it's normal to miss her.

  • 5 months ago

    i'm sorry for your loss, your close relationship with your grandmother reminds me of the close relationship i have with my mother, grieving takes a long time, you never really get over the loss but just learn to live with it, i think grieving therapy could help you and i hope times heals the pain somewhat, all the very best.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.