I lost my virginity to my boyfriend who almost cheated on me, is it a mistake?

I love him so much, I've have always loved him since we were kids, as we grew up together in the same house. Long story, his aunt and him were clandestine and mom let them stay for a few years with us, then they moved away. I met him again and all the longing I had for years ended. I love him so much I cannot... show more I love him so much, I've have always loved him since we were kids, as we grew up together in the same house. Long story, his aunt and him were clandestine and mom let them stay for a few years with us, then they moved away. I met him again and all the longing I had for years ended. I love him so much I cannot even explain it, but he almost cheated on me as he danced, laughed ans joked with a girl at the country fair I tried so bad to go, since that day I worked like 8 hours. As I came I saw him dancing with her and almost cried. He was all happy to see me and didint understand my tears and my disappointment at all. He was also drunk and tried to grab my arm to stop me. The following days I was so mad I blocked him, not answered to his call and hid in the back of the house when he came to talk to me, so I forced mom to lie. Last time my mom got mad and told me I have to let him in and explain. He came into my room, I shouted at him and cursed him, he started crying for the first time in my life I saw him crying, begged me to forgive him and told me he loved me and she doesn't care at all about the other girl. She just asked him to dance. We argued and we both cried. At some point he was begging me to end the discussion and be like it was beforeand cried on my chest as I comforted him. It was really intimate and emotional, and I kissed his head and told him not to hurt me anymore like this. He kissed me really strong and started to touch me, and we ended up making love
Update: And it was really emotional and tense cause we were still shocked and messed up because of the argument. I lost my virginity to him, I dont regret doing it as he is the one I've ever loved, but will he love me the way I do, the same crazy, absolute,infinite way I love him? Or to him I am just another girl and... show more And it was really emotional and tense cause we were still shocked and messed up because of the argument. I lost my virginity to him, I dont regret doing it as he is the one I've ever loved, but will he love me the way I do, the same crazy, absolute,infinite way I love him? Or to him I am just another girl and not the special one he grew up with?
5 answers 5