I made my boyfriend cry (he who never cries) and I feel so bad and guilty?

He never cried before, he was always strong and the one who took care of me. Today I had a bad breakdown, things arent going well at all at school, I'm facing bullying and racism to the point of wanting to end my life. Instead of having suicide thoughts I decided to go back to my homeland, I habe an old aunt... show more He never cried before, he was always strong and the one who took care of me. Today I had a bad breakdown, things arent going well at all at school, I'm facing bullying and racism to the point of wanting to end my life. Instead of having suicide thoughts I decided to go back to my homeland, I habe an old aunt who lives there. She has no children and she agreed to take care of me and made me attend school there, hopefully a group of spoiled teenagers wont hate me all together. My parents are not haopy about this and dont want to leave me. Mom cried today and she told my boyfriend. He cant believe I will go to the other side of the world. He tried everything to convince me, and saw the signs of my self harm and started to cry, and ended up begging me and he hugged me in a weird way, with his head on my chest, hugging me tight, too strong like he didnt want me to go. I decided that either I will kill myself or I will live a normal life in my homeland with people who don't want to hurt me. I told him if you love me let me go... though I hate having to be far from him, I need to go back cause I cant find peace here. He cried on my chest like a baby and begged me not to. I feel so sorry for hurting him so much. But I cant do it other way
9 answers 9