How do I stop his ex from ruining our relationship?

I started dating my bf when he filed for divorce many years ago. We’ve been on and off but always end up back together. They have hated each other ever since he filed and never tried to fix things. He says she wanted to spend too much time with him and he couldn’t take it anymore. Fast forward to this year and now... show more I started dating my bf when he filed for divorce many years ago. We’ve been on and off but always end up back together. They have hated each other ever since he filed and never tried to fix things. He says she wanted to spend too much time with him and he couldn’t take it anymore. Fast forward to this year and now they turned into too good of friends. She spends the night at his place, has a key, and even go out to eat and on trips together for the kids. We spend every holiday together but lately he’s had to work every holiday. They text and talk often but not of the kids they talk about the future (he was drunk and I saw the texts) I know she blames me for breaking them up and he has no feelings for her but how do I set boundaries for her? She’s gone as far as going to friend events. He never missed my son’s soccer games and now he misses them all the time. I want to marry him but I’m scared she will find a way to ruin it. Help?!?!
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