Anonymous asked in HealthMental Health · 1 year ago

Does it make sense to live for me actually?

Life has had always hard for me because of being outsiders and to have human contact during the internships and school because of lack of social skills. Always had issues with depression, started to take anti depressants when I was 20. When I was 24, attempted suicide two times. After that, decided to leave the country. Then started to study a master degree. After one year, my depression came back and had to give it a break. It took me more to finish my study than expected. I had meanwhile suicide attempts, toxic relationships, drug experiences. After a while, I stopped taking drugs and anti depressions. Focused on my study and started a relationship. We are now married. Words are not enough to tell how much I love him. After a while he helped me to find an internship in a department he knows the people. Even I was old for an internship, I started to do it. All the social anxiety came back. I feel like people notice how weirdo I am.

I know after this, I will not be able to find a job or stay in a job more than 6 months.

I dont want to have kids because I am so afraid that I could affect them in a negative way by being not social and depressed.

So: Does it really make sense to live

If I cannot work/produce something and earn money

Can not give a child

Cannot have friends.

If I am not able to contribute evolution.

And if my husband leaves me because I am too depressed. because his friends' wives are fitting with the society and therefore he feels embarrassed me?

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 year ago
    Favorite Answer

    1. Kids are not everything. In fact this world is overpopulated. You do not need to have kids if you don't want them.

    2. Money is not everything. Yes, we need money to do **** but holistically speaking it's not when it comes to mental health. In truth, this entire world is screwed up. Our systems suck. We were not placed on this planet to work a basic 9 to 5 job, have kids, and then die. Forge your own path. You do not have to follow the "rules" of society. If people look at you weirdly, who gives a ****? Anyone who judges someone for doing any mere action must not have a better way to focus their thoughts and energy. And 99% percent of the time, those people actually do not care. It seems like they do, but they really don't. We're all the center of our own universe. We think about ourselves waaay more than anyone else. It's a fact. And other's, believe it or not, are thinking the same thing, worried about what others think of them in every small or large way.

    3. You could perhaps pursue a business or (even though this will be very competitive and not very stable) pursue a social media platform for income (like YouTube).

    4. Also, if your husband leaves you, he shouldn't have been your husband in the first place. That's not love. You will begin to have confidence in yourself and carry on independently. Love is overrated, especially if it's not true. This will be your little test to see if he's really worthy or not.

    Make use of your life, really. Our mission is not to follow what we think we're suppose to follow. Let death come to you, don't come to death. It will take you when the time is right. Up until then, live your life to the fullest. And seek counseling if you can.

  • Toruko
    Lv 6
    1 year ago

    I've seen and heard worse when paid to serve

    within a state hospital for the criminal insane.

    You're not there yet and somebody like me isn't

    going to shoot you dead if attempting escape.

    Not today. I recommend emigration to Pitcairn

    Island. The islander promise as a new resident

    you get a building site, assistance in building,

    and like everybody else you're expected to go

    assist whatever their community needs. Most

    male adults were adjudged for sex crimes and

    aren't likely to see that island again..

  • 1 year ago

    yes cause god wants you to live

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.