Anonymous
Anonymous asked in HealthMental Health · 6 months ago

My roommate is very depressed. What can I do to make it easier for both of us?

So I've been living with this dude on a lease for 7 or 8 months now. It's been difficult living with him for a multitude of reasons. I need some advice on how to maybe get through to him as I still have 4 months left on the lease before it ends and I would like it to be stress-free as possible. He is really really quiet. He can't really hold a conversation, even the simplest of small talk, it feels like I'm talking to myself when we talk sometimes. He is very standoffish and seems to get intimidated very easily so it makes confronting him and communication about simple roommate things really difficult. He's honestly extremely awkward and seems uncomfortable and tensed up all the time and it gives me a lot of anxiety. He rarely ever goes in the kitchen/ living room when I'm in there. Recently I did ask him if there's anything I've ever said/ done that has made him uncomfortable around me and he said no he is just doing homework a lot. I know that isn't true because you can see his room as you are walking up to the apartment and I've never seen him do homework he's always playing video games. There's definitely a lot more to explain about the situation but I don't have enough space. Basically its obvious he's depressed or something. I get it, I've gone through some dark times myself, thats why I'm kinda empathetic towards the way he acts. However, him being unavailable all the time is really difficult. Is there anything I can say that will help get his head above the water?

Update:

Want to add that once I confronted him about constantly not cleaning up after himself in the kitchen because we had roaches, he tried to blame it on me and then told me he did it because he was going through a depression so this is how I know something is going on. The way he isolates himself is concerning, the reason why it's difficult is because we can't communicate on the tiniest of things and it's really frustrating. Sometimes it feels like I'm living alone.

10 Answers

Relevance
  • 6 months ago

    You are not depressed, so you stand a greater chances to help him get out of what he/her is going through. first, stop pushing him/her on conversations that you know will trigger his/her now condition. Make him/her feel love, constantly check on him/her and spare some of your time with him/her cause loneliness kills. Try to be supportive in what ever little way you can. Prayer works, ask him/her to pray with you, in the prayer commit the situation to God in a way he/she will feel the love of God.

  • 6 months ago

    barbara

    get off his back

  • 6 months ago

    Cook a really nice dinner spaghetti cures all depressions.

  • 6 months ago

    Kill his depression with kindness

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 6 months ago

    make her feel better

  • 6 months ago

    Ok yip yip yip yip yip

  • 6 months ago

    Try to find out the basic reasons for his depression then apply tentative solutions.Depression in most of the cases not a permanent disease.

  • 6 months ago

    You are the problem. You are expecting for him to perform for you. You won't allow for him to peacefully enjoy his right of privacy. You are asking for it. He acts like most males do and you expect him to be more female. You are wrong and need to get a life.

  • 6 months ago

    Check with the college or university you are attending to see what student counseling services are available. Schedule a visit with a counselor and show them what you have written here and use that as the basis to have a frank discussion on how you are doing and what concerns you have about your roommate. Perhaps they can send a counselor to visit with him to see what assistance they can offer.

  • 6 months ago

    get off his back

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.