Why do all abusers have the same things in common?

I've noticed abusers have the same traits, why is this? Did they receive a "How to be an Abuser 101" book in the mail or something? What is the cause behind the same words and tactics they seem to share with other abusers? My question isn't meant to be read as sarcasm I'm genuinely asking.
Update: Yahoo automatically put this question in the wrong category i dont know why. I mean verbal and physical abuse in relationships. Both seem to have the same traits: hurt your partner and gain control over them.
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