It's between Satomura, Asuka, and Aja Kong for me. Meiko and Aja have enough size and background as dominant badasses to make it believable that they could at least compete with a man. Asuka sells like crazy and has great comeback spirit in her bouts with men, although her encounters with the likes of Suzuki have been pretty hard to watch, even for the most ardent of equal fights defenders. I'd consider throwing Madusa and Tessa in the pile because they at least faced off with a fitting weight class. Chyna just wasn't a great wrestler, but her build did make her believable. If I had to narrow my options down, I'd probably say Aja Kong out of the listed. She was a joshi killer and a big woman who hit hard.
BA: Young Bucks vs World's Cutest Tag Team. They had a lot of great encounters, but the one with the thumbtack sneaker spot sticks out in my mind as iconic. It's online for free somewhere still. Candice was a great underdog in peril. She had a great one against hubby Johnny Gargano in AIW that resulted in her breaking his jaw early on, but they still had a great match. Lufisto vs Larry Sweeney in CZW holds a special place for me. It's not very death match considering the setting and half of the participants (Lufisto's big with death match stuff), but it was a great match. She's had quite a few I enjoyed and she's another one I'd put on the list of great intergender wrestling women. I choose that one because it puts her toughness and wrestling on display without leaning into the death match stuff as hard. Tessa had a great showing in PWX's X16 tournament a couple of years back. There were multiple great ones. Kimber Lee had a great run with the Chikara Grand Championship where she fought a lot of men, but nothing sticks out immediately as great. I feel like I'm missing a glaring omission though, but I'll quit rambling for now.